Sad rant

Yesterday my partner and I had a fight and he said something that really hurt and demotivated me. Recently, I have been more open to learning about abuse, racism, sexism and more. I've been trying to educate myself about this kind of things because I have experienced most of that issues personally. I've been advocating anti abuse, sexism and racism because it also helps me to start writing again, especially now that it is for a positive cause instead of me always writing about my depressing life. I always aspired to be a writer and not only does this help me to learn how to cope with my past, it also helps me to move forward. Honestly, I'm the kind of person who doesn't care about a lot of things back in the past. I was very judgemental, I couldn't care a damn thing about anyone or anything. Because of that, my partner called me a hypocrite for suddenly starting to care. He said I was acting like a smarty pants for trying to learn about all this and educating him as much as I can about it. This really demoralised me to be a better person and to pursue my recently opened passion for writing again. It makes me feel like I should just go back to not caring about anything anymore. What saddens me the most is that we are both about to be parents to our baby boy otw and if he thinks I'm a hypocrite for trying to learn about abuse, sexism and racism, I think our mindset on raising our kid is different. Idk what to do or feel anymore. Maybe I should just stick to being a bad person and not care. Sigh