The fact that your son does not ask for his pacifier when he is in the presence of other children is promising. I'm very confident that he will continue to outgrow his pacifier as time goes by and eventually give it up completely. Since he uses it as a tool of relaxation, perhaps you can replace the pacifier with something else whenever he asks for it. A friend of mine would give her son a juice box each time her 3 year old asks for his pacifier. Another friend "sabotaged" her daughter's pacifier by poking a tiny hole in the teat. Her daughter gave up the "binky" after realising that there is no more resistance when she sucked on it. She threw it away herself because it didn't "taste the same". Alternatively, you could go the extreme route and just tell him that his binky went missing.
I think you need not be too worried. He does not seemed to be overly reliant or attached to his pacifier since he doesn't ask for it when he is outside. Sounds like he just enjoys suckling on it (while doing mundane things that's not too engaging). If you are really worried and would like to try weaning him off, simply have a talk with him. Tell him that he is going to be a big boy now and needs to say goodbye to his pacifiers. Have a "ceremony" to put away all his pacifiers to help with the transition (just letting him put everything in a box would do and keep the box away). He sounds like he would be ready for this and should be able to move on easily.
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