Husband owes me close to $100,000.

Rant: My husband is 13 years older than me and earns at least 3 to 4x of my current salary. I lend him a few thousands 5 to 6 years back for house renovation (i was 23 years old then and i told him that i can't afford any costs when it comes to marriage & kids as I have only just graduated), yet until today he has not returned me the full sum yet. Subsequently, he tried to get me to invest my savings instead of putting it with the bank for higher interests. I transferred a huge sum to him and now that i wanted the whole sum to be transferred to me back, he kicked up a big fuss and threatened to divorce. I feel so helpless. Lend him money yet must beg him to return as though I am at his mercy. I don't know what to do.

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Just my 2 cents worth: 1. Do not lend him anymore money. 2. Do you have the transaction record that the money was transferred from your account into his account? If no, he can say you are accusing him. If yes, good but still not strong enough to prove you lend him the money. 3. Do you have the proof that he told you to transfer your money to him for investment? He can say you gave or returned him his money. 4. Do you have proof by when he will return your money? 5. You may need to record your conversation with him discreetly to prove is your money and he told you to transfer to him for investment. 6. Do you think he loves you since he threatened to divorce because you want your money back? 7. If he doesn't want to return you your money then the only way is through legal way but that goes your marriage. Take care. 🌈

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Oh dear it does sound like he doesn’t have money to return to you? Are you aware of how he spends his money and where he keeps his savings? Most importantly, did you keep a record (black&white) of you transferring money over to him and lending him big sums of money? Do you have access to his emails to check for bank transactions? I think I’d stop letting such a person have control over my finances because if divorce do come along, this man gets away with all my $$

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VIP Member

Never give him anymore money. He just wants money from you not love. Why threaten divorce if you done lend him any money? If he is earning so much, he can invest himself or share the investment under 2 names and 2 parties must agree to buy or sell. Maybe he didn't invest money. He might be splurging on his own. You'll never know if there is no evidence of his investment portfolio and statements.

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TapFluencer

Sound like me and my ex. He is older than me by 13yo. We dated for almost 4 years even plan on getting a condo due to his high income. But things changes aound 3rd year he owe me 50k.i realize that he wanna controlled me more than having me. That's when i give up and move on. I don't want a marriage that is full of control and i will be miserable.

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VIP Member

This sounds worrying. He might have already spent all your money. You need to have a talk with him, show you all the statements or official letters of the investment he made for you. Gather the “evidence” first. Don’t give him any more money.

Are u sure he earns 3 to 4x of your current salary? It looks like he is earning lesser than u if he wants to take control/meddle in your finances 😓

I don't think he earning more than u. And u gotta stop transferring money to him.