Hi Mummies, Any of you feel that your Husband is not pro-active with kids? My Husband always need to me tell him what to do with my #1.. I'm currently pregnant with #2. I have told him that he needs to be more pro-active now that I'm pregnant with #2 but he is not. LO is not close to him and I feel like I always the one who discipline her. I am not too sure whether I'm expecting too much. My husband is doing all the chores now due to my pregnancy. Daddies can provide some opinions as well.

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Totally. Still wake up post noon and just slack on the sofa with his phone most of the time with no initiative to help - as a result LO already 1.5 yrs old is not close to him. Don’t even know how to do basic things and can’t be bothered to remember. How the father behaves really makes you consider if you want no.2. I wouldn’t want no.2 if I have to do everything myself. To be clear parenting is a joint responsibility and the father is not “helping” the mum but he should be shouldering his share of responsibilities. Other than not being able to carry the baby for 9mths to term, give birth and breastfeed, what excuse is there not to do anything else when both parents are working? The dad is not just a sperm donor!!

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I always suggest things for my Husband to do when he comes back home from work... I'm SAHM, pregnant with no.2. I suggest things for him to do because i need more rest and also to help my toddler bond with him. So I will say things like "ok daddy will read u a book now... daddy will brush teeth for u..." stuff like that.. As for discipline, we don't have good cop and bad cop. We always stand on the same side. But we don't use caning as I feel it doesn't really work. Unless my toddler does something repeatedly on purpose then he gets a smack on the hand. Otherwise it's always time out corner. Both my husband and me adopt same method of discipline

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i feel u... though im not pregnant at the moment but I the one taking of my LO when I at home.. though I understand he is busy but there r times whereby I wish he could bear some responsibilities like help LO bath or change diapers etc.. he just simply leave everything to me.. I can understand that during normal times.. but times like now where I m down with flu & cough, I wish to have more rest.. all these make me reconsider if I want a no.#2 in future...

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It's already a good thing that your husband is doing the chores. Maybe your husband doesn't know a way to handle your #1. Different parents have different ways of handling. So he probably doesn't want to do it differently from you?

It happens more often than not. sometimes they’re just clueless. it will help to tell them exactly what they need to do sometimes, or leave a note at the fridge if they’re forgetful

I would think that husbands are usually more passive meaning if you don't expressively tell them what you want them to do, they will not do.

5y ago

Ya. I feel you. For mine, at times i think it is quite a no brainer to even tell him what to do. One thing is, though i wish he can shoulder much of the responsibilities, but sometimes the way he does things, i still need to clear the mess or redo again i feel even angrier towards him. Eg: asking him to wash poopoo. He can either used up half packet of wet tissue or washed until as though LO just bathed. Sometimes still nt cleaned. 🙄 so actually some husbands are really nt so meticulous in doing such "chores" Sometimes i do also have resentment but, forget it, i will tell myself there is always difference between men and women! Thats why mums are created in a way that we are so wonderful! Hahaha 😂

Many wives would want their husband to help. Your husband helping with the household chores is a good thing. you should give him credit for it.

Try talking to him.