Unsure about mom life ahead

I was 24 when I first became pregnant (it was planned) but I wasn’t sure if I am ready to put down everything to revolve around someone I haven’t met. I didn’t felt that connection that most moms mentioned even tho baby was in me. To me, baby is baby, me is me when she’s still inside. It wasn’t love at first sight for me, it took me awhile to fully accept the fact that okay, this is my daughter, my life is gonna revolve around her from now. My husband on the other hand is not your romantic nice guy as well. Gradually overtime, my love started growing as she grows (although occasionally I still think about the “what ifs” life if I didn’t have a family or a baby”). I am a SAHM alone with baby most of the time, I fall sick, I am tired but when it comes to my baby, I do it willingly. Your love will grow and you’ll realize that it will only grow stronger everyday. So it will definitely get better, all the tiredness are bittersweet and you will definitely miss having these moments again when they grow. Now at 21mo, I would give her the stars and my life if I had to. She is my life. In the meantime, enjoy all the unfinished dramas and unlimited metime before baby arrives! 🥰

I always feel bad because i would scream at her. She is at the terrible two now. But if i compare her with other fren’s, actually she is not the worst. I wasnt someone who had loved kids so i didnt have my first kid young. The first many years of my wedding i just didnt wanna have a kid, i just wanted to travel more. Over time, especially when she was out.. i realise actually she makes me a happier person (thou sometimes still drive me crazy). But my ger sticks alot to my hb.. she basically can do without me ahahah. Enjoy the time now while u can! Im glad i had flew twice this pregnancy!