I have a 4 yr old son. He is aggressive towards younger kids than him. He is the only child with no small cousins etc around us . Even in playareas he will hit the ones younger to him without being incited. On seeing them he will push, hit and kick. Even if strangers smile etc. he will reply on unfriendly tone saying No. Otherwise he is a normal, hyperactive but very intelligent and observant of his surroundings & people. Is it because I slap/spank him whenever he is aggressive with me. But if I do not hit or spank/slap him he pinches etc badly. He will be joining an International school this August in Singapore and I am worried as to how he will be with kids their. He is short-tempered. I am very fed-up.

Maybe you can teach him from a different approach. Instead of hitting him or using a loud voice, tell him slowly. Take his hands away and say, " it is not right to pinch people, would you like somebody to do it to you? " Let him have timeout whenever there is a meltdown. Let him sit at a corner to calm down. Do not attempt to scold and shame him in public, take him to one side and talk to him if it happens outside. Most of the time, how children reacts, is what the parents or caregiver are showing them. Children learn what we do, how we react, how we speak. Sometimes, they just needed attention, put some time away and play with the child, make him feel loved so that he knows how to love. My son used to be this way too. Then I realised, I am not spending enough time with him. I shout at him all the time when he did something wrong. But I have never hit him so he doesn't go around hitting people.