husband has many female friends, is that normal?

My husband has many female friends. Actually, I've been aware of this since we were dating before marriage. He's genuinely kind, so many girls feel comfortable being friends with him. Initially, I didn't mind and even found it cute. However, as we entered the third year of our marriage, I started feeling somewhat disturbed... especially when he went out to hang out with his friends and they didn't allow him to invite me. I have to admit, his friends aren't very friendly towards me. They barely greeted me on my birthday. I don't like it, and I want my husband to stop being friends with them... am I being overdramatic?

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Hi there, First of all i truly felt your worries are true. A married personal should limit their contact to opposite gender, regardless they call it “friends/step-sister/buddies). This allows their spouse feel emotionally secure. I would suggest that you could sit down and talk to your husband about how you feel, and how his “friends” treat you. Please don’t let him pursuit you that you’re “thinking too much”. Because if your already feeling it, means is real. You should ask your husband to set the boundaries. And make things clear between you and his “friends” in-order to continue down the marriage. If his genuinely “kind” please let him put it at home instead of outside. If his not willing to let go his “friendships”, then you need to think about other alternatives “ by law”. Personally, i won’t suggest anything too extreme unless my spouse committed with any “extra ordinary actions”. But i set my boundaries high, it has to be in order to maintain our marriage. Lastly, please take care of yourself, your wellbeing is very important.

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You’re not, especially if those friends who asked him to not invite you are females. They have to know that he has his own family, by inviting his spouse is an act of respect regardless whether or not the spouse wanna join. I am super introvert so I hate gatherings, especially with a whole bunch of strangers (my husband’s friends) so I’ll always reject to be there, but at the very least, I know who he is with. Talk to your husband, raise your concerns, especially those red flags with his friends (particularly female friends). He should stand up for you, albeit his kind character because you are his wife. Basic respect towards your friend’s spouse and maintaining a safe distance with your married/INR friend (opposite gender) is common sense.

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sharing my story - my husband also has few close female friends. he even commented to me before that one of them knows him the best amongst his friends. one of them also disregard my presence and even asked my hubby go help her carry things when her own fiancé was there. so I threw an ultimatum to my hubby telling him he needs to understand how I feel about his female frens and whether he thinks it's worth it to keep having arguments over these frens or is our marriage more impt. so end up he distanced himself from the frens... though there are times he will say he has no frens coz of me but I will tell him I only dun like when he hangs out w these females and also those frens who are bad influence (smoking, drinking, getting into fights).

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hi 👋🏼 it's normal to have friends doesn't matter of thr gender as long as you know your limits. but once you have a partner we have to set boundaries. me as a person have guys friend. we hang out and stuff. but once I have partner I set my boundaries and priority to my partner come first. but if I have those type of friend who said my partner not allowed it shows me red flag. I rather lose a friend than lose someone I love. it just shows me that friend isn't really a friend. talk with your husband. it helps. sometimes he just doesn't see the way you see or feel how you feel. communication is key remember.

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I am on second trimester and I have not received any mental support from my husband. We live in different towns. He is caring more on his happiness, hanging out with his friends every night , drinking and smoking. I, in other town, am on my own and very emotional these days. I am thinking to leave him now as he cannot move here, neither do I, he earns less than me , only cover his own bill. I see no future with him and I am thinking to leave him.

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2mo ago

Hi there mummy to be, When i read your comments, i felt the frustrations and abandonment by your spouse during this transitions period of your life. I won’t say i understand how you feel, as i’m not you, but i believed is very difficult for you. I hope that you have some support from your family and friends at this moment of your life. No one can force you or decide what you need and want to do with your marriage. Although some said “think about your child….”LOL. Whats the point on staying on when the pain is greater than the care. Anyway i hope you found good ways to deal with your situations. Especially during this time your emotions are more vulnerable due to your hormonal changes. Please take care😔.

Not dramatic. Your concerns are valid and he should consider your feelings especially because he is married to YOU. If his girl friends do not treat you w respect or not friendly to you, those are red flags that your husband should be aware of

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No you’re not overthinking. If your husband respects you, he won’t allow his friends to treat you like that. Trust your instincts and act accordingly.

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