Help! Need advice. Baby is 5 months. Fully breasted. Majority by bottle. She sleeps with helper. In the last month, she refuses to latch at night. She was ok to do it last weekend during the day. ( full time working mother) .. I keep putting my breast to her face., and she cries like mad nowadays.. She jus cried until she vomitted jus now.. What should I do? Persist? I m Sooo tired and heartbroken.. It makes it worst that I have to balance time between 2 kids.. ( toddler boy ) .. Pls advice .. Give up or persist?

Going anonymous as I don't want to be shamed for my choice. I actually gave up latching and breastfeeding altogether as my own sanity is so much more important than getting baby to have that slight edge. And frankly speaking breastfeeding is totally overrated. I spent 10-12 hours researching the benefits of breastfeeding from a pure science point of view and its very clear that breastfeeding is important for first 3 months and then it's frankly not that important anymore. The returns you get is so diminished vs the effort put in. I think it's much more important that I get my rest and sleep and stop the struggle to have baby latch on. My little one is 5 1/2 months and I stopped breast feeding altogether about 3-4 days ago. She is now 100% on formula milk - and I feel so much better and i spend that extra time being a much more in focused mother when am spending time with my baby. At the end of the day, I am sure baby wants a happy mum and not a tired, overworked and stressed out mum. Btw I am full time working mum too and baby sleeps with helper as well.

I have a feeling that it has something to the lack of skin-to-skin contact between you and baby. You mentioned that baby sleeps with the helper at night and that you are a full time working mom. Hence, there is a lack of skin to skin contact. And this could be the reason why she does not associate your breast with a positive experience. Spending lots of time in skin-to-skin contact with your baby on your bare chest can help to remind your baby that this is a nurturing place to be. You can try sleeping with her on some nights, or on weekends. Skin to skin contact can help your baby to use her instincts to find your breasts on her own. In this way, skin-to-skin contact can take the pressure off both of you. I hope things work out better for you and baby. Don't give up mommy!

Hang in there mummy! One of my friends managed to "re-latch" (she had to stop breastfeeding for a while due to medical reasons) her baby after numerous tries. It was tough and disheartening but she persevered through and finally managed to do it. Her tip was simply try whenever possible. Even when baby refused the attempt, don't force the baby and try not to be discouraged. She also found that trying to breastfeed while baby is sleepy helps too as the feeding will be more instinctual and there is a higher chance of baby accepting the breast. Take care and all the best!!

Persists but don't force. I can't latch because of the shape of my nip and I choose to pump fully from the day my milk kicked in. I managed to give y gal full ebm till she's 1yo and frankly speaking, I do see the difference between a formula fed bb and a breast fed bb, in terms of their immunities. My elder boy was breast fed till 5mo but he seems weaker in the initial months. Both went to IFC btw, and my gal fell sick less. So try to breastfeed if you still have the supply, even if feeding is through bottles...

To get her latching as much as possible. Feed her just before you go to work, and ask your helper to ensure a schedule during the day so that you can feed immediately when you get home. Keep baby in with you during the night (your helper shouldn't be working through the night anyway), so you can get lots of contact and skin to skin as much as possible through the night. I know you're working full time (me too), but being tired is just a normal part of being a mum :D

Mine awake also refused to latch and he is 5 months old. I am ftwm as well and I hv 3 kids. I sleep with bb although I hv helper as I feel I can bond with him at night. I will carry him until half sleep then latch. I latch at night and bottle feed day time so far he likes to half sleep then drink milk and I never force.

Give more time for your toddler boy. Soon or later he will latch. In the meantime, just use bottle for feeding and from time to time try to latch to see if he want. Maybe you can change different position to let him latch. Mummy Relax.... i know sometimes will feel heartbroken but never give up. Stay strong

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I think just give her e bottle..don't need force her to latch. U can spend time playing with her instead...and my personal opinion is that babies shouldn't sleep with helpers...