Hi Mommy, I can't imagine how you are feeling right now. There are no words to describe the pain, loneliness and sadness that you might been feeling. Your story is quite similar to mine.
I got married last 2021, we already planned to have a baby right away kasi I was 32 na that time and I got pregnant right away kasi regular naman ang period ko. I desired to have a baby boy as eldest, so during sexual intercourse namin ng hubby ko we made sure sa 1st day of ovulation kasi para boy talaga small lang kasi life span ng boy chromosomes, and with the help of science and prayer boy nga 1st baby namin. My 1st trimester was not that easy, I had spotting pero close naman ang cervix ko base sa tvs. So I was thinking baka implantation yun. During sa 1st tvs, I found out I have polyps pero maliit lang naman. Polyps are harmless as long as hind sya lalaki walang complications kapag nagbuntis. Hinaharang kasi ng polyps ang cervix kapag ito ay malaki, but mine was small, usually daw nagkakaron due to hormones ng pregnancy. But I still have spotting, since ftm ako, di ko alam mga bawal, but sabi ng OB (resident), refrain from sexual activity and too much physical activity. Unfortunately, nagka clot ako after a week, I thought nakunan ako, I went back ulit sa OB, 2nd tvs to check if the baby is still there, at ayun kumapit nga. Dahil nagpackage lang ako at resident doctors lang nagche check, pa iba2, so walang prescription like iinom ng pampakapit or whatever, so akala ko din okay lang. Eventually nagstop naman ang spotting, until umabot ako exactly 26 weeks. I didnt know na stress ako kasi mataas tolerance ko sa stress, I was stress pala mentally and manifested in my body unconsciously. I had a brownish discharge Tueasday, until Thursday, meron ng blood, so ER agad kami. When we got there, I was 7cm dilated na, wala ng magagawa kasi I progressed agad, napaka dali ng progress. I did not expect na magpre preterm ako kasi nagstop na ang spotting and nagstop na kami ng sexual activity. Natakot ako, ni ready ko na sarili ko including my hubby, yung baby ko naman lumalaban never nag down ang heartbeat, steady lang talaga sa normal heartbeat, kaya sabi ko gawin nila lahat to save my baby. Umabot pa sya ng 32days sa NICU, we thought lalaban sya kasi extubated na siya, naka oxygen na siya na O2 yung sa ilong ilalagay, I worked hard to pump from time to time kasi breastmilk lang pwed sa kanya, buti nalang kahit stress ako nilagay ko sa isip ko na I need to produce milk for him, kaya abundant pa rin yung milk ko at may supply lage si baby. Kaso kapag 26weeks talaga malayo pa sa maturity ang lungs, yun yung pinaka problem ng baby ko, we had Kangaroo Mother care once, the next day, kinuha na ni Lord dahil biglang may infection, prone sa infections kasi talaga kapag preemie, and then nahirapan huminga kaya ayun hindi kinaya. Masakit kasi akala naman tuloy2 na siya for recovery, actually kapag sa ibang bansa ang 26 weeks or 25 weeks malaki talaga chance dahil advance yung mga gamit nila dito sa atin kasi hindi.
Now sa tanong mo if meron ba connections ang polyps, wala po, pero kapag nag sex kayo nakaka stimulate po ng open cervix at spotting, yung pag swimming niyo possible yun yung main cause, kasi kapag may history of bleeding, as much as possible wala talaga byahi or heavy activity, talagang nasa bahay kalang deprived from activities to make sure hindi nag tri trigger. Yung 5cm mo, impossible na po mag close kasi 5cm na kasi mahirap, I wonder why pina uwi ka agad, hindi ibig sabihin na wala kang nararamdaman walang contractions, possible pareho tayo mataas tolerance sa physical pain, or painless labor, meron mga babae na hindi nakaka feel ng labor (ito yung delikado po lalo na hindi pa kabuwanan). Ito kasi yung inexplain ng OB ko ngayon kasi buntis ulit ako, but hindi na kagaya ng first pregnancy, but for precautions hindi talaga ako umaalis ng bahay at nagbyabyahi as per OBs advice. Deprived din ako sa activities kahit gustong gusto ko ng mag exercise kasi mahilig ako non, babawi nalang ako kapag masa 37 weeks na ako.
My advice po if okay ka na, healed kana at ready ka na emotionally and physically, as much as possible be extra cautious na po, magtanong sa OB, wag po maniwala agad sa katawan dahil di ibig sabihin walang nararamdaman wala ng nangyayari lalo na kong may bleeding or spotting, kapag brownish wag isasabahala, kahit konting spot, or browinish discharge punta agad, wag babaliwalain to prevent po labor lalo na di pa kabuwanan. And lastly, get pregnant not because you are sad or you want a replacement right away, get pregnant kapag healed kana emotionally, mentally and physically hindi lang ikaw including na asawa mo. I am very sorry for your loss po, dark and gray man ngayon, but there will be a day the rainbow will shine po. Balik ulit sa tanong, hindi po cause ang polyps, but it could trigger, hindi ka po ha chineck kong anong possible cause? hindi ba nabiopsy ang placenta mo? dapat may ginawa ang doctors to rule out ng factor sa preterm labor mo, sa akin kasi walang nakita physically, the only factor they can rule out is the stress lang. Wala talagang exact reason ng preterm labor, but may mga factor kong bakit, dapat nakalagay sa medical certificate niyo yun.
Anyways, take your time to grieve po, grieve well, iyak kalang, normal lahat ng feelings mo at valid lahat yan. Its okay maging irrational for now but wag bumigay sa irrational thoughts and feelings kasi usually they can cause wrong decisions. Share ko lang, 11 months after pa kami before nagdecide magbuntis ulit kasi hesitant ako, nag consult kami sa OB yung specialist na talaga hindi na din ako nag package, kaya kong di ka satisfied sa OB or hospital mo nong 1st pregnancy, lumipat ka. God bless po mommy! praying for your healing
Anonymous