My wife is very hot tempered and she like to hit me when she lose her temper. She will dig her fingernail into my skin and sometimes she will slam my head against the wall. I don't want to hit her back. I love her. I believe she loves me too. How can I calm her down. And stop her from abusing me like this.

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Talk to her ask her to do meditation sessions for few weeks regularly and then analyze the situation. It entirely depends on the mind to control things. Listen to her carefully and deliver what she is expecting, but this will be temproary fix she needs to control the mind through own thought process