My in-laws are coming to stay with me for a month and I am a little worried. I have my baby on a schedule - meals, baths, play, sleep. This allows me to work and have some quality time with my husband. However, my in-laws like my daughter to have a routine more aligned with theirs -- she should nap when they nap, then stay up late so that they can have more time with her. They are lovely people - but i really don't want her schedule to be upset. How can I speak with them about this?

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I suggest that tell them politely that she has a set schedule and it was very difficult to set this routine for her and again if you will change that routine it will again be such a task, plus it is takes a toll and the baby and she becomes quite cranky and then doesn't eat well. If required, you can tell your husband to pitch in and make them understand.

Some issues are not worth fighting about, especially when it comes to kinship. If your in-laws cannot compromise on an arrangement, take a bit more time after their visit to re-adjust baby's schedule. Meanwhile talk with baby to pre-empt her about PIL's visit; I'm sure she'll be excited!

You might ease the routine for a few days as your in-laws will be coming only for a few days. Let your daughter enjoy with her grandparents some unrestricted and unstructured time. Once they go away again everything will be as per schedule.

Be upfront and honest about the situation. If you're not up to talking to them, let your husband do it. If it's for the benefit of the baby, no loving grandparent would say no. Good luck!

thanks