6 Replies
1. To each his own. Personally, I'd prefer at least a 2 year age gap so tt my first is more independent. I'm currently pregnant with my 2nd who will be 3 years apart frm her brother. 2. Again depends on your agreement with ur husband and perhaps ur own siblings might influence this. All this if finances aren't a big problem. Personally, I don't like being all alone but 2 for me is just nice. I myself have only 1 younger sister but my husband prefers to have 3 or 4 as he himself has 2 younger sisters. So best to talk it out with ur hubby. For us, we eventually decided that for the first 2, we deliberately plan it out. And we want to be able to still go on multiple holidays so 2 kids are just nice, not so hard on the pocket too! For the third, we'll likely wait till we get a bigger house but tt said, my age is also catching up, currently age 34 pregnant with my 2nd. So I'd perhaps settle with at most 3. Furthermore I've gone thru csect, and will be soon too again, so I'm kinda afraid to stretch tt wound further 😅 3. In my opinion, best to sort things out abt the marriage first. It isn't healthy to continue the marriage without dealing with tt first.
I personally have one kid and do have plans for second one but I’m scared that I can’t handle or balance out the love. 1) 2-3 is a good age gap because by the time the newborn arrives, the older toddler can communicate and understands better. Older toddler can also help to teach your younger kid. 2) Depends on how you see it, but definitely don’t have a second for the sake of company for the first. If you’re financially stable and have enough space and have the thought of a second child then go for it. I grew up in a 6 siblings family and as the second child, I am also the most left out one. Whereas my cousin is the only child, she grew up as a gem. Also, having a sibling doesn’t always guarantee they will always be there to share your load or be there for you, some siblings are toxic (like mine). 3) Definitely NO.
1) So long it’s a happy relationship between siblings, any age group is fine. I have seen older child disliking the idea of having a younger sibling. Also, you may want to think about your financial/living arrangements. 2) Not necessarily. It depends on the parenting and living qualities. I enjoyed being the single child for a long time until I have a sister. Luckily she adores me and things get better as I’m older. 3) Definitely no. I need to be in good shape before being a good parent to a young soul.
1. 3 years 2. Yes. I have 2 now. And its so much better EVENTHOUGH i’m so much busier. Most probably because my expectations get lower with the second and I sort of know how to handle my own emotions dealing with kids. They fight a lot but at least they entertain each other😅 quite cute to see siblings love/hate relationship. Nvr regret having a second one. 3. NO. Never. Not worth the risk
1. I agree 2-3 yrs is a gd age gap. My ger n my 2nd child (soon) will b 2yrs+ apart. Hopefully will b a good jiejie to my boy. 2. I would tink so coz when both of us r not around anymore, they have one another to tc of each other n discuss together. 3. I would not
1. at least 2-3 years so #1 will be easier to handle 2. yes, they will have each other when parents are no longer around and wont be such a financial burden on #1 3. no, i wouldnt want to put another child through us parents fighting