Stopping adoption process

Hi mummies, I just birthed my baby girl few days ago on Aug 2021. I had planned for her to go for adoption for the longest time due to disagreements from family and that my boyfriend felt we were unable to provide for her. I have always wanted to keep her but I have no choice but to send my baby girl for adoption. My adoption was through an agency and private - not under MSF. I cried so hard signing the affidavit to give up my child for adoption and was threatened I will be disowned if I kept the child. I have been thinking for a few days and crying nonstop thinking about my newborn. I am thinking if I should just stop the process and get my child back, get disowned and wing it with the support of my boyfriend or just accept my fate and tell myself it's for the better as the adoptive parents will be able to provide for her. I feel bad for the adoptive parents who probably prepared for her arrival and wasting the adoption agent's time.. But I can't stop thinking about her and crying over her. Please advise or give opinions and not be so harsh. #advicepls #pleasehelp #firstbaby

Anonymous

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Hi, so sorry to learn of your predicament. you need to consider how you will be providing for your child in different stages of her life. She will be most dependent in terms of care during her early years 0-7. since you are working full time, and your family is not supportive, you need to consider who will be looking aft baby while you work. Infant care centres in Singapore are not that cheap. Check how much you need to spend monthly aft subsidy to plan your finances. Not everybody walk the same path, whether you get married to ur bf or not it is not the main point. Think abt why your family oppose ur relationship with him so much. is he abusive, not working, or any other serious issues? You need to consider how you will care for your child if one day the father is not in the picture. whatever decision u make is a good decision from the baby's perspective, just that with adoptive family, she might find more stability. you have to make a decision and accept whatever it is. there is no going back, so keep looking forward. Wishing you all the best!

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