MIL - why are they being so difficult

I’m a FTM to a healthy 4 months old baby boy. I just want to rant about my experience living with my MIL. From the start of my pregnancy, I can tell that she don’t care one bit. She never mentioned anything or asked anything about the baby. Eg how’s baby is doing? Is baby growing well etc NEVER. Once I was admitted to the hospital for abdominal pains during my pregnancy but got discharged the next day, i got back home and instead of asking how me and the baby were doing she said “aiya im also not feeling well.” Also another example at 37 weeks I was +covid and was admitted again for a week and not even once that she even called to asked how baby and i were doing. But here comes the most annoying part, once I gave birth, my husb and I brought our baby back home, she’s the one who so yaya papaya wants to carry the baby, wants to do this wants to do that. There’s so many hurtful things that happened to me during this 4 months but one of the most unforgettable moment was when she secretly clipped my baby’s fingernails till it bleed while i was at work and when I confronted her about it, she was so unhappy and didnt talk to me at all and only cooks for the rest of the family including my husband except for me. It’s not that i’m hard up about her cooking but I feel like this is unnecessary. I stood up for my baby who must be crying like hell the whole time shes trying to cut his fingernails and I wasnt around. If anything i should be the one offended because this is my baby! I gave birth to him and she should respect me as my baby’s mother. She always have this mindset that she’s the only want that can calm my baby and that she has taken care of her own kids so she knows better than i am. I dont care if she has 10 or 100 kids of her own but this is my son so everything will be done my way. Why do MIL always have to make things difficult

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Best solution, move out if u can! If your hubby disagrees den just go with your baby! My super actress evil MIL is always e tigger of mine and hubby’s arguments (9.9 out of 10), till that one incident that my MIL gone overboard and made my husband left me and baby outside all alone for hours, witness my baby hungry and tired while her daddy busy “escort” his QUEEN mother home with her LAME EXCUSE “no taxi”.. Imagine, SG no taxi at AMK? And e heartbroken seeing how can my husband left us like this for hours? That night, I never show any anger to my husband because my heart was really hurt badly.. Since he treated his mother more important than both of us, I told him “let get divorce since you’re always siding your mother.. I don’t see e point of us continue and I am tired of your mother and how e way she been treated me!” Of course we didn’t sign on paper, but that was e time my husband finally understood and he don’t go to his mother’s place so often since then.. some might say how can I stop him? but can these ppl understand whenever he’s at his mother place he is like a maid? And since his mother doesn’t like girl then why should me and baby even go there? Anyway, since then I also don’t look at my MIL whenever I talk to her.. Let her taste back her own evil doing!

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Babe, we all FEEL U. My Mother-In-Law also ONE KIND 🙄🙄🙄. Thank God she’s in Msia and I never visit her since Covid. She once said nasty things to me during CNY when we was in Msia for visit, in front of my hubs cousin she bluntly Or stupidly asked me” Oh, why u haven’t get Pregnant ? ALL THE COUSIN GOT MANY CHILDREN, why never give birth to one soon”??? Wow, this super triggered me and I just smile and ignored her. I ranted to my hubs if I open my mouth to tell her off, ALL MY WORDS TO HER WONT BE NICE LIAO, so please deal with her. and he tell her off by saying “U thought go market buy food Ah, off the counter able to get one baby??”.. I remembered TILL THIS DAY!! Now I’m pregnant, I never talk much to her regarding my pregnancy when we called her. Her reaction turn nicer towards me only when in 2019, I had a miscarriage. AND SHE KNOWS ITS NOTHING WRONG WITH ME, as she always thought that izzit something wrong with my fertility etc. So I advice u, please move out if possible. Living with Mother-In-Law is super NOT easy. Take care and stay strong for your boy 🥰

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I told my husband from the start when we were still dating. I would agree to get married only if we have our own home. Period. He agreed and also has the same opinion since he likes privacy. I don't want to live together with PIL, coz we will never know if we can live in harmony or not. I super firmed on this house thing, coz I experienced it last time as a kid, seeing how my mum was always unhappy during her life with her MIL, worst her SIL also like to side with her mum. 😵‍💫 My mum often quarrel and cried. Thankfully my PIL both are nice. My MIL is caring, but sometimes I just can't stand her superstitious thing, but I take it as her sign of caring. My FIL is the super quiet one, so I am ok with that.

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Sigh, MILs are the worse people to deal with, really. My MIL was the same. Didn’t care about my pregnancy, told me I was fat and constantly wanted to touch my belly cause my mum does that. Like, who are you to touch me? 🙄🤷🏻‍♀️ After I gave birth, she keeps coming over to our place to stay. And she stays for weeks!! Towards the end of my confinement she was covid positive and didn’t even bother to sanitise the house. Super not auto and don’t help around the house also, machiam Queen only. All she wants to do is carry baby and show off to her friends. 🙄 MILs are the worse really. I just roll my eyes whenever she says anything and her mere existence triggers me. 😅

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most MILs are horrible monsters in law!!! my MIL also never asked anything about my pregnancy, saying that it’s pantang. she made me dislike her so much during pregnancy. now whenever she tries to carry my baby, he scream and cry like mad. i hope you have opportunity to move out and not live with her? it’s so toxic and her behaviour is SO passive aggressive towards you. you are right standing up for yourself and your baby. kudos to you mummy!!! we are all behind you 👏🏻

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problems like this happen when u stay with in laws best solution is to get ur own place to stay . that way it won't be too hard for you .. now 4 months alrdy u having a hard time imagine 1 years old in terms of the kids intake , sweets and all .. u will say don't give they will still give. in the end , u will be seen the bad one and ur mil the good one . this happens as they love their grandkids and they want to sayang them but u need to prepare and plan things ahead . else it will be hard on you .

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Totally feel you. My MIL didn’t ask anything about me and my baby after she knew about my pregnancy. We had some conflicts and she asked me don’t use my baby as an excuse to keep my husband in this marriage. I moved back to my own place, staying separately with my husband until our house is ready. Since that day she said those words to me, I never call her, go back to her house when she is around. I’m so much happier now even though staying separately with my husband. Choose your sanity over her.

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1mo ago

How can a MOTHER even says such thing? Is she happy to see her grandchild to grow up in single family? Crazy! I hope your hubby knows what’s going on and supporting u! 😊

Ahhh so angry!!! Dear please move out and get your own house. Must set boundaries. Before i got married i told my husband i won't ever stay with his parents. And the moment i found out i'm pregnant, i set boundaries, list out what we can allow or cannot allow when baby come. Don't let inlaws or anyone take control of your family ok.

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MIL also didn't care much about me when I was pregnant. but when the baby was out, she's trying to do this and that. pretty annoying when I was staying with her. I can't take it anymore so alr moved out, not staying with her. if your finance is okay, you might want to consider moving out.

You can consider to move back to your parents place or send your baby to infant care. Don’t need to see her mood and put up with her :) Don’t care about her lah. Just treat her as transparent.

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