3 children, too much?

I was admitted yesterday because of contractions and I am already 3 cm dilated. Everything was okay until a senior doctor came and his first question was, "This is your third baby, really?" and he started throwing in more questions. "Where do you stay?" "What type of house?" "How many rooms?" "What are you working as?" and the last thing was, "I want you to think what you're going to do with your life after you gave birth to this third baby, please consider taking contraception." I was on contraception and I still got pregnant, he suggested a stronger one now. Am I being too sensitive over this issues because the moment he left, I cried. Everything he asked, there is nothing to do with his work. Too personal, no? There's a lot of nurses and other doctors standing next to him and they were looking at me while I was expected to give specific answers. My husband and I live in a 2 rooms rental flat for now because next year, we planned on purchasing a resale house. We've been saving up a lot of money. We chose to moved out from our parent's house after marriage to be independent and we want privacy as well. We really do start from scratch. We're in our 20's. We thought that 3 children is okay? The rest of our family members have more than 3 children and we didn't judge them.

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I was pushed contraceptions methods while I was pregnant with my first. After I gave birth I was pushed with the options again, they literally kept bugging me n I just decided to get implanon but I bled everyday for a year straight then I went to get it removed because I wanted another child. Now that I'm pregnant with my second (1st is coming 20mo) I'm still being pushed contraceptions during EVERY SINGLE CHECKUP. I always reject. Zz. That aside I'm also constantly asked by the doctors what I plan to do with my life? What our plans are after baby comes? The plan is to raise our kids, what else? Why does it concern them? We want 3 kids too, is it wrong? I plan to get contraceptions after our 3rd, not any sooner 🙄 I always get so frustrated when they ask me, I understand that I am quite young but I'm NOT that young, I've also always made it clear that my pregnancies are planned so I really don't get why they're so pushy. I thought govt wants the birth rate to increase? Or has that changed lol

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Felt really uncomfortable on your behalf . Why would a doctor even questioned that? Is he even going to help you raise your children ? If not, how dare he raise all these sensitive questions in the presence of others. That is just plain rude and disrespectful. Having how many children is your personal choice so long as you and your husband stay committed and be responsible to the kids. The opinions of the rest does not really matter. Even if you have an only child, there’s still people going to say that’s too little should have another child as a companion.🙄 What matters most is to keep yourself happy in order to raise happy kids. Lastly, I hope you won’t see this rude doctor again. If you did and he’s trying to be rude all over again, pls call him out and ask him to mind his own business.

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Oh the nerve of that doctor! Asking you things like that as if he was going to be helping you out with raising the kids, or paying your rentals and bills. Honestly I wouldn’t have been as patient as you were, I’d probably ask him back, “Where are you going with all these questions?” That aside, I hope you will keep on going. Just hold on to your plans, and don’t let his comments get to you too much ok? And change your doctor, if you must. I did, and my doctor wasn’t even rude or anything, we just weren’t jiving very well. The last thing you need is the stress every time you see the doctor. Also, 3 children is okay! Am currently pregnant with baby no 4, so 😉 You have your own plans for your own family, and they don’t have to live up to anyone else’s expectations. Take care!

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Oh wow.. The Dr really insensitive n got no EQ.. If I were you, I will kick his face when he come to check my vjj.. I went to KKH too for my both child and luckily both gynae are ok.. The gynae for my first child never even mention about it. The gynae for my second child did ask whether I planning for another child or would like to take contraceptive. She even encourage me to have another one since I'm still young.

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I think you should lodge a complaint to the hospital to let them know about this issue. cos they need to realise that this type of personal questions may lead to post natal depression for some mothers. let the hospital to investigate and decide if they wish to penalise that particular doctor and to set a record straight that they should not ask mothers such a personal questions!

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Wow the audacity of that doctor! I would not have been as patient and kind as you to answer him. Instead, would have told him to mind his own business and stick to being an obstetrician. I hope everything turns out well for you. Just focus on your delivery for now and if possible, request for another doc cos you don’t need this totally unnecessary stress at this point.

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which hospital you went to? high iq but low eq this doctor. i think his approach abit too much. sounds very judgmental. and thn there they go about SG low birth rate this and that. my first one doctor told me to take contraceptive. i told him back “it took my 7 years to conceive my 1st now why would i wanna be on contraceptive?”

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3y ago

KKH 😣 I wanted to change to NUH but it was too last minute.

I’m staying in a 2 room rental flat and I really don’t give a F**k what the docs say as they are NOT financially supporting my kids I am…. Never let a doc pull you down you are who you are I’m due soon with my 7th child and there is nothing wrong with that… docs told me I’m too young 33yrs with 7 kids

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* Another thing is, my husband and I already discussed regarding our future plans and family planning way before we came to the hospital and is staying in a rental flat really a shameful thing? We're saving up money and we're not staying in a rental flat forever. We just do things slower than others...

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3y ago

I'm staying in a 2room flat too. it's not ashame. at least you get your children a house to stay and keep them safe. 🥰 have a smooth delivery💪🏻

some docs are really kuku. part of the brain has short circuit. if my children become like him, I will definitely throw him into river and feed crocodile. wondering how he passed his exam? lack of etiquettes as a doc..