Partners & In-Laws

I am in my second trimester. My partner and I have been having alot of problems recently in regards to his parents getting involved. He and his mother has taken the time to draft out names for the baby without even asking me and they are even talking about where our child will be schooling without informing me. When i have voiced out my concern to him he gets defensive and with my pregnancy hormones I get so annoyed at him. Has any been through this?

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Haha it’s like he and his mother were the baby’s parents. I think it somewhat stems from the fact that you and his mother not being close enough? That’s why got this kind of trust issues. It’s true that when we marry someone we marry the family as well. Honestly I don’t know the whole background but if you want to try, can initiate some gestures of peace with her. Buy her fave food or bring her to lunch for friendly chat or smth just to understand her

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4y ago

I thought we were on good terms. But the moment they found out about my pregnancy, everything changed. She and my partner were writing a list of names, looking at schools... I told my partner I appreciate it but I am not comfortable and all I wanted was to make sure the baby was growing nicely. But he got defensive instead

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I unds babe. my mil ALWAYS want to "help" to the point i don't even feel like I'm the mother :') and when i reject her help,she say I no respect and even give stupid comments like "that's not how u suppose to do this/that. I never did it this way" so 9mths aft my baby was born. I decided I wasn't gonna tolerate her anymore. Ive been avoiding her and ignoring even tho I'm living w my in laws. I feel. happier not listening to her bs lol

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4y ago

My MIL is not even here and she manages to control my partner. She tells him I should let him be a man and his feelings count more than mine. It is so frustrating to keep telling him to just put the baby and I first and we make the choices. He says I am too proud to accept hia mothers help. But I am not. I just want to choose my own childs name, school and so on... sigh

Don't ever ever let your parents in law get involved!!! That's why i ended up divorcing my first husband!!!! And until today she is so kepo with my kids. Especially my daughter cause it's her first grandchild and it's a girl after having all boys for herself. So pls pls pls talk to your husband. It will be a problem.

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Hey, I think you have every right to be annoyed at this as you have the first right to decide anything for your baby. Your partner should equally be involved but he should give your decisions priority. I suggest please talk to your husband about this

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TapFluencer

Before pregnancy I reiterate I'm the mother and I have my way nurture my child and don't need any involvement from others. Understanding from partner is important, u need to make your partner understand & agree with u my child my way

4y ago

I have tried. But he always geta defensive and his mother always steps in to his defense. He says why am I too proud to accept help is it because I will feel the baby wont be 100% mine. Which is a dumb thing to say.

Super Mum

I believe ur hubby and his mum also have good interest for ur baby. However, you can let ur partner know that you want to be involved as well, as the child is yours too.

VIP Member

Mine, mil decided on the chinese name. My husb comforted me by saying, ah ma named chinese name, mummy named english name, daddy din hv a choice of name 😓😓