Silent marriage

Question

I am in 8th year if marriage with 2 young kids. However our marriage been a silent one. We both are working in MNc and been very busy and engaged with our work . Often a time my hub work 10 hours in the room . We had no chance to make small talk at all . He give me max. 5 min of attention when I talk about my life. He dont remember r things that I told him . He make no effort to communicate with me expect child related topic. He hid in toilet for hour and look at his HP passed midnight but not replying the msg I send . At the beginning we are already not a good couple who can communicate effectively . I had asked him to go for marriage counseling but was rejected. Now with kids , things get worst . We NV talk for month . I understand the Asian man ego who like to act tough . But I felt very disconnected with him .He is now just my kids father . We had sex once a week and I felt that we are doing so only bc as a man he need to release his sex drive. I only get 5 min hugs after we are done. We dont hold hand outside unless I initiate it. I am lost in the marriage but he think I am too sensitive and selfish  , kids come first . Is that normal marriage life ? What can I do ? I felt my self esteem is so low , everything I do is wrong and selfish in his eyes.

Anonymous · Answer

I do understand you. We need to care our kids first. That is true. But that doesn't means connection between couple should go down after the kids. It should enhance after kids. If he doesn't like to go for counselling. Find some experienced and elder person to talk with him. You can send him some article links him to read related this topic.