4 Replies
If you have not already spoken to him how he behaves when he has sobered down, then have a word with him that how his drinking habit is adversely affecting your life. And if you have tried it all and nothing seems to work, coax him to see a counsellor. You can tell a friend or a person who is aware of his abusive habit to talk to him. As if you will seek help from someone he wouldn't want to be involved, things can backfire as well. Sometimes, it happens so that in his sober state he would understand everything but when he gets drunk he would be his same abusive self, so it is not that he doesn't realise that what he does is wrong but then he has no control over himself. And it is best to seek the help of a counsellor. The are professionals and know how to handle such situations. Let the counsellor guide you if his will-power is not that strong that he would leave alchohol. Also, here the problem is not just alcohol but also his being abusive. If he is abusive that means in his personal life, he would be a dominant and egoist. So, you have to see a counsellor for this as well. His behaviour too needs corrective measures.
I think you have to have a chat with him when he is sober. He has to recognize that it is a problem and be willing to take steps to change. Have him take a look at this AA site: http://sg.theasianparent.com/risks-of-mmr-vaccine-could-it-cause-autism/http://www.singaporeaa.org/index.html see if he is open to attending the meetings. Or go to a counselor to help him kick the habit. http://www.wecare.org.sg/pdf/soar-flyer.pdf Take care of yourself and please protect yourself!
I think you should have a direct word with him about this when he is in a sober state. Try talking to him nicely, without sounding accusatory. tell him that you love him, and once he drinks, he abuses and insults you, which hurts you a lot. if it does not help, ask him if he would be willing to visit a counsellor. tell him that you really want to take care of this situation and want to be by his side.
Please send him to counselling and also get a protective order to protect yourself! Prevent him from drinking again and try communicating to him when he's sober and reasonable. Let him know you are keen to help him and face the problem together as a couple. Encourage him to go for counselling and let him know they you cares. Be positive but also remember to protect yourself.