Divorce after a baby

My hubby and I are in a rough patch. We’ve been together for almost 11yrs. Married for 3yrs with a 1yr old baby and been in a LDR for 9yrs. When I got pregnant, our agreement was for me to get back in shape within 6mths but it did not happen. Things got worst and now we are looking into a potential divorce. At the very start of the relationship, he did mentioned he is very particular on his partner’s outlook. So there’s no lies in this and I went into the relationship knowingly. We even had an understanding if either have feelings for another person outside of our relationship, we would end our relationship first so we don’t give each other a chance to cheat on each other. I trust him that there’s no 3rd party currently. I failed on my part as his partner but promises made back at the start of pregnancy was without fully understanding the demands of a baby and it does not help that I do not get help with baby due to Covid. We are financially alright so the split sadly to say is because of me being out of shape after pregnancy. On one hand, I really want to salvage this relationship because we’ve been together a long time. But on the other hand, it reach to a point if it means happiness for him, I’m willing to let go. I’m not sure what’s next and what’s the point of me letting it out here. Its just a shame that the split had to happen when baby turns 1yr old. I’m not sure if anyone here has been through the same thing as me and how do you move on?

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Hi guys. Thanks for the reply. To be fair to him, he never wanted a kid. He was 50-50 on this. We had a kid more coz i wanted. It may sound twisted but he ended up loving his child. And he comes from a broken family so the last thing he ever wanted is for his child to go thru the same. The thing is, he couldn’t hold this together anymore because its either the adults are happy leading separate lifes and child suffers a broken family or child is happy but parents are unhappy staying together for the sake of the child. Tbh, i know its shallow of him but he has been very upfront about it. Maybe it is just my fault for pushing this relationship thru from the start coz this body image issue had been all along a problem, just that it got worst after I delivered. There is really no reason for him to cheat coz all he needed to do was to let me know he fall out of love and fell for someone else, and this relationship ends.

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2y ago

Be it 50-50 or accidentally… Anyone with conscience wouldn’t do this. Especially when you risk your life and body to bring his child to this world. Don’t put the blame all on yourself please, it’s his mindset that needs reflection. If it was so easy for him to inform you that he fell for someone and it ends and on the other hand, that easy for you to accept this fact.. Then you should really just let it go and stop wasting time on this marriage. To me it just sounds like there isn’t anymore love in this relationship. But, afterall I’m just someone online… what we advise is only based on our POV, you should decide for yourself and I sincerely hope the best for you and your child. ⭐️