5 Replies
I liked all the above mentioned tips given. The situation is that each child is so wonderfully different. Hence what works for one, doesn't work for the other. Your question in itself is quite complicated as it doesn't touch on areas like why do u say no or for what is your kid demanding or why the need for discipline. According to me, discipline is more like leading them away from issues than just saying no. It's like when Shepherd's are looking after sheep and using the rod...the rod is not used to beat the animal or nudge him, but rather to turn it's direction towards where it's supposed to go...it's a shift of sight. Of course children are not sheep...but what I'm trying to say is kids need guidance always....whether as babies or grown ups...so try the following... When he starts to cry, sit down with him and tell him that neither he nor you will get up till he stops crying and is going to listen to what you say.. Or The item he wants you to buy is not going to be given to him till the shopping is over. Once shopping is done he will most probably forget it. If he keeps in his hand, take it gently from it and keep aside away from sight by giving him a small candy or chocolate or fruit. Or Never shop when it's going to be an hour or two close to his feeding time or sleeping time...he will definitely throw a tantrum as you have taken away his precious time with you and given to something he considers very trivial. Or, I used to do this when my kids throw a ruckus....I would walk away out of their sight but Jeep a eye on them. As they see us slowly walking away, they too get up and move. If he argues, tell him that you will only talk to him when he behaves well and stops crying. Never ever cave in to their cry immediately. Let them fight for it. If kids are older like between 3-5 ,you can tell them that if certain things are done by them like they eat their veggies or keep their toys in the toy box etc then at the end of the month you will buy that thing they wanted...
Instead of saying "no" you can try a different approach by explaining to them why they shouldn't do certain things. For example, instead of saying "you cannot do this" change it to "you should/can do this". Encourage them instead of stopping them. Instead of "you cannot have candy before food" change it to "candy is not good for your dental health, it can cause your teeth to drop". Never promise your child by saying maybe tomorrow as they cannot comprehend time very well. You have to calmly and firmly offers them their food. Kids usually hates it when you tell them no and it can breed resentment or plant seeds for future rebellion.
After having tried to calm the child down but it does not work, my friends would use the traditional method of the time-out. If their kids misbehave, they will be sent to their rooms with all their privileges (tv, games, toys, snacks, desserts) taken away for a stipulated number of time. For younger kids, this works too because throwing tantrums for a while, they will tire themselves out and fall asleep.
be positive when u speak with yr child. kids doesn't like or rather they will programme wat they want to hear only. you may have to use both the soft and hard approach concurrently. educate him that thriwing if things and tantrums isn't a pleasant thing to do.
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