When will the worry stop 😔

Hi everyone! It's my first time being pregnant and living independently. It's just me and my unborn baby. I didn't know that pregnancy would bring me this deep feeling of sadness, strength, and hope. I literally have no one and my pregnancy is kind of high-risk. I found out last Friday that I have an "incompetent" cervix, I keep blaming and asking myself why can I excel in everything else and yet be or have an "incompetent" ability to carry a child safely, and it hurts.. because I always wanted to be a mom. I'm so scared, my OB advised to wait for 2 weeks for another check up and ultrasound since she can't detect a heartbeat using a doppler, I'm 9 weeks pregnant by the way. Each days passed feels like forever, I don't know what to expect, I don't know where or who to lean on.. I feel sorry for my baby.