When it comes to involvement as a grandparent,how do you balance in laws vs your own parents? Is it fair to assume that whoever is not working has a greater responsibility?

I agree that we shouldn't expect them to take care of your kids. If they readily volunteer their time n insist on helping, a bonus for u! Count your blessings because so many in laws/ grandparents don't help out much! So keep your own lil family box in place, be a Super mummy n appreciate any extra help that comes your way!