Ask the Expert: Managing BIG Emotions in Parenthood: Bakit ang bilis kong magalit at umiyak?

πŸ—¨Topic: 😫😑Managing BIG Emotions in Parenthood: Bakit ang bilis kong magalit at umiyak πŸ₯²πŸ‘ΆπŸ»β“ πŸ—“ Date: Wednesday, April 24, 2024 ⏰️ Time: 1.00pm - 3.00pm 🀱🏻πŸ₯² πŸ’¬Hi, I'm Kate Delos Reyes, Founder of Beacon and a Mental Health Advocate. Join me at the Ask The Expert session on dealing with BIG emotions in parenthood! πŸ₯²πŸ˜‘🀱🏻Kasama ang theAsianparent team, tutulungan ko kayo na mas maintindihan ang ating emotional and mental health as parents. Pag-uusapan natin ang mga sumusunod: Bakit ang bilis kong magalit o umiyak nung naging Nanay/Tatay na ako? Bakit mas madalas na kaming mag-away mag-asawa nung nagka-anak na kami? Why do I experience BIG emotions as a parent? How do I properly deal with these emotions so they don't affect my child’s development? How do I know if I have Postpartum Depression or Anxiety? And more... See you!

Ask the Expert: Managing BIG Emotions in Parenthood: Bakit ang bilis kong magalit at umiyak?
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π‘¨π’Œπ’ π’π’‚π’Žπ’, π’π’Œπ’‚π’Œπ’‚π’‘π’‚π’ˆπ’‘π’‚π’”π’†π’π’”π’šπ’‚ 𝒑𝒂 π’‚π’Œπ’ 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒐 π’Žπ’‚π’š π’•π’Šπ’Žπ’† 𝒏𝒂 𝒏𝒂𝒑𝒖𝒑𝒖𝒏𝒐 π’‚π’Œπ’.𝑡𝒂𝒔𝒂 π’Žπ’‚π’ˆπ’–π’π’‚π’π’ˆ π’Œπ’ π’Œπ’‚π’”π’Š π’Œπ’‚π’Žπ’Š π’π’Œπ’Šπ’•π’Šπ’“π’‚ 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒐 π’‘π’‚π’“π’‚π’π’ˆ π’…π’Šπ’π’‚π’…π’π’˜π’ π’Œπ’‚π’Žπ’Š π’‘π’π’“π’Œπ’†π’• π’˜π’‚π’π’‚π’π’ˆ π’˜π’‚π’π’‚ π’Œπ’‚π’Žπ’Š. 𝑷𝒆𝒓𝒐 π’…π’Š π’π’Žπ’‚π’ π’Œπ’Žπ’Š 𝒏𝒂𝒂𝒔𝒂 𝒔𝒂 π’Œπ’π’Šπ’π’‚ π’ˆπ’‚π’˜π’‚ π’π’ˆ π’Žπ’‚π’š 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒃𝒂𝒉𝒐 π’π’‚π’Žπ’‚π’ 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒏𝒆𝒓 π’Œπ’. π‘°π’šπ’‚π’Œπ’Šπ’ π’Œπ’‚π’”π’Š π’ƒπ’‚π’ƒπ’š π’ˆπ’Šπ’“π’ π’Œπ’ 𝒕𝒂𝒔 π’˜π’‚π’π’‚ π’‚π’Œπ’π’π’ˆ π’Œπ’‚π’‰π’‚π’π’Šπ’π’Š π’‘π’‚π’ˆ π’˜π’‚π’π’‚ π’•π’‚π’•π’‚π’š π’π’šπ’‚ π’ˆπ’‚π’˜π’‚ π’π’ˆ π’Žπ’‚π’š 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒃𝒂𝒉𝒐 π’Œπ’‚π’šπ’‚ 𝒂𝒕𝒂 π’π’ˆπ’Œπ’‚ π’‚π’π’™π’Šπ’†π’•π’š π’‚π’Œπ’ π’ˆπ’‚π’˜π’‚ π’π’ˆ π’‘π’–π’šπ’‚π’• 𝒂𝒕 π’…π’Š 𝒑𝒂 π’Žπ’‚π’Œπ’‚π’•π’–π’π’π’ˆ 𝒔𝒂 π’‚π’“π’‚π’˜. π‘΅π’‚π’Œπ’‚π’Œπ’‚π’π’–π’π’ˆπ’Œπ’π’• π’Žπ’‚π’ π’Šπ’Œπ’˜π’†π’π’•π’ 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒐 𝒔𝒂 π’‡π’‚π’Žπ’Šπ’π’š π’Œπ’‚π’”π’Š π’π’‚π’Žπ’Šπ’ π’ƒπ’‚π’˜π’‚π’ π’Žπ’‚π’•π’–π’π’π’ˆ 𝒔𝒂 π’‚π’“π’‚π’˜. π‘°π’π’ˆπ’ˆπ’Šπ’• π’‚π’Œπ’ 𝒔𝒂 π’‚π’”π’‚π’˜π’‚ π’π’ˆ π’Œπ’‚π’‘π’‚π’•π’Šπ’… π’Œπ’ π’‘π’‚π’ˆ π’”π’‚π’ƒπ’‰π’Šπ’ π’π’šπ’‚π’π’ˆ π’Žπ’‚π’”π’‚π’Žπ’‚ π’‘π’‚π’Œπ’Šπ’“π’‚π’Žπ’…π’‚π’Ž π’π’šπ’‚ π’‚π’–π’•π’π’Žπ’‚π’•π’Šπ’„ π’•π’Šπ’π’–π’•π’–π’π’π’π’ˆπ’‚π’ π’”π’šπ’‚ 𝒂𝒕 π’‘π’Šπ’π’‚π’‘π’‚π’•π’–π’π’‘π’ˆ π’π’ˆ π’Žπ’‚π’ˆπ’–π’π’‚π’π’ˆ π’Œπ’ 𝒂𝒕 π’π’‚π’π’…π’Šπ’•π’ π’π’‚π’π’ˆ π’…π’Šπ’ 𝒔𝒂 π’ƒπ’‚π’‰π’‚π’š π’Œπ’–π’šπ’‚ π’Œπ’ π’‰π’–π’Žπ’‚π’π’Šπ’π’Š 𝒔𝒂 π’‚π’π’‚π’Œ π’π’Šπ’π’‚ π’‘π’‚π’ˆ π’Žπ’‚π’”π’‚π’Žπ’‚ π’‘π’‚π’Œπ’Šπ’“π’‚π’Žπ’…π’‚π’Ž π’π’ˆ π’‚π’”π’‚π’˜π’‚ π’π’šπ’‚

Magbasa pa

Does anyone feels like out of place or there's no constant atmosphere when couples lives with the in-laws in one house? Just curious because I lived in my in-laws once then I had this feeling like his family's always observing my movement and it makes me feel that all my movements are wrong to them even if they're not saying anything. Like for example: when the child's father isn't around for 4 hrs and so on so forth then the atmosphere changes fast that I can feel the negativity and a bit hot surrounding around me.even if the weather's cold. Because it all started when I was 6 months preggy, it was early in the morning when I heard my MIL says my name just once in low tone of voice while talking to her daughter because they thought that I'm not awake yet but then, when they saw me walking towards the cr in distant they stopped and a minute later my MIL walks outside like nothing happened. I don't know what to do, because whenever my hubby is at home my MIL treated me well and talking some stuff about life but when his not around my MIL doesn't talk to me, when she does its only one sentence like: "you done eating?" and after that it's like "ah ok reaction". What's the problem? Am I the problem because I didn't finish my studies yet? (Because all my hubby's siblings are already a degree holder also him) Because if they hate me by not having a degree I guess I'll have to rush my studies by shifting easier course. If that's what they want for the sake of my own. I don't know what to do, I feel like I'm starting to hate them but I don't want to express it. I don't want my hubby get hurt cuz I know he knows better than me because it's his mother and his her son. I'll have to carry this burden in me but couldn't help myself anymore that's why I need some advice maybe by this, I can have some peace of mind and start collecting something that could help me coop up the main problem and start solving or correcting what's the error. I really need your advice

Magbasa pa
4w ago

It's rare to feel at-home with in-laws. You feel out-of-place because you are, in many ways, a stranger in their home. Just as you are adjusting to them, they are also adjusting to you. However, I don't encourage you to do something just for the sake of pleasing others. Kung magshift ka man ng course at maka-graduate, kung hindi ka parin nila gusto, anong next na gagawin mo? Diba? Walang guarantee that they will like you. The only person you can control is yourself.

I'm always irritated after birth he always play on his computer My partner works full-time to support us and our son and when he is finish at work he just wants to unwind. I'll ask him to briefly hold the baby or play with him while I pump breast milk but he's never that happy about it and so I don't feel comfortable asking for more help. Our son is super fussy because he has tummy problems and by the end of the day I'm so exhausted from trying to sing to him rub his belly bounce him talk to him and do everything I can to keep him happy that I just need a little break. I don't know how to ask for this because I feel like my husband already does enough by going to work so I can stay home with our baby. I'm also getting resentful because he doesn't help much with him at all. Our son can't nap by himself because he's a super light sleeper and just has to be on the boob so even when he's napping I'm laying with him and I don't have time to do anything for myself. Which is okay I've accepted it but I think I need a little tiny break every once in awhile. How do I communicate this to my partner?

Magbasa pa
4w ago

This stage is really tough because nakadikit dapat palagi si baby. But you are correct -- you also need a break. When your husband is out at work, you are also at work at home. When he comes home, your individual jobs end and the shared job begins. To communicate with your partner, start by telling him how you feel. It's easy to fall into the trap of pointing out what he does or doesn't do and that will likely end up in an argument. But if you focus on how your situation is affecting you mentally, emotionally, physically, then your husband will be less defensive. Hope this helps you, mama!

Me and my kids (one is 5yo and the other is 4mos.) have been living with my in-laws while my husband is away, working. I really don't mind my MIL and Sis-in-law helping out especially with the baby, but I'm really feeling very possessive especially when baby is with SIL, acting like she's the mom, taking baby from me even when I don't ask her to.. Also, she's been spoiling my 5yo by buying her with so much stuff (hello junk food!); I really do appreciate it but I don't know why I'm feeling paranoid that they, especially my baby might become closer to her, she's able to make baby laugh more! :( I don't have problems with my own mom & sis but when it comes to my in-laws, it becomes a problem to me. We don't have any problem with each other but I don't know... I really hate this feeling. I don't know what to do. :(

Magbasa pa

simula ng magkaroon ako ng 2nd baby which is 10 mos. na sya. lagi ko napagbubuntungan yung first born ko. napapalo ko sya, nasasabihan ko sya ng hurtful words which is hindi tama. sa sobrang daming problema sa bahay feel ko naaapektuhan yung mga anak ko. yung pag iyak nila, naiinis ako, yung kakulitan. napapagod ako umiiyak na lang ako sa gabi, kapag nagdarasal ako o kaya matitigan ko mga anak ko nagsosorry ako ng malala. napakasama kong ina sa kanila. nakakapagod na ikaw lagi kumikilos sa bahay, hindi ko rin naman masisi yung asawa ko kasi call center work nya 9pm to 6am, pag uwi kakain kami ng almusal tas matutulog na sya. gigising lang sya ng 1pm para maghatid tas tulog ulit. gigising ng before 6 para bumili ng ulam. ako lahat gumagawa sa bahay, napapagod na ako. feel ko hindi ko deserve to.

Magbasa pa
4w ago

Hi Mommy! Ang hirap mag-adjust from one baby to two noh? Ilang taon na yung panganay mo? Kung nakakaintindi na sya, pwede mo syang kausapin ng masinsinan. Normal lang na magkamali tayo sa mga anak natin. Ang mahalaga ay makapag-sorry tayo at maipaliwanag sa kanila kung ano yung mali sa nagawa natin. Chance din natin yung na maturuan sila ng life lessons. Sometimes, we feel that we don't deserve our situation especially if it's far from what we expected. Perhaps you and your husband can have a discussion to set new expectations. Talk about how you feel. Also ask him how he feels. Check mo rin if you have postpartum depression so you know what you're dealing with at para makakuha ka ng proper support: www.beacon.ph/ppdtest

Bakit ang bilis kong magalit at umiyak? As a first time mom, taking care of my baby since birth up to now na nasa toddler stage sya. what made me cry is yung pagod sa pagaaalaga lalo na pagka may sakit si baby yung super exhausted kana d makatulog sa pagbabantay. Na maiisip mo mas okay pa na nagwowork ka coz it's a big responsibility but the joy it brings to you to experience all the milestone's ni baby na nothing can compare when you're working. yung pagiging irritable naman sa husband I guess when you're too tired sa maghapon tapos gagalitin kapa na gusto mo na lang magpahinga sa pagdating nya kaso minsan hindi kaya siguro we experience that with our husband/partner coz sometimes they don't understand us. we also feel a lot of emotions as a mom

Magbasa pa

Hello, I'm 21 and 3 months pregnant. This is my first baby. I know the first trimester is very critical for the development of my baby but I've been really stressed and depressed since the very beginning of my pregnancy. It's because I feel like a failure for being pregnant this early. My family was really disappointed with me but eventually accepted the baby and supports me since I still don't have a job but I already graduated last April this year. Sometimes, I can't help to be depressed because my pregnancy was very sudden and I feel like I won't be successful because of what happened to me ? I also don't want to feel this way since it will affect my baby. I need some advices mommies. Thank you

Magbasa pa
4w ago

I understand that you are in a difficult situation. You must feel different emotions all at the same time and it can be very stressful. It's good that your family has been supportive. You will continue to need their help. All moms do. As for a possible depression, you can take an online test to find out if you might have depression during pregnancy. 10% of pregnant moms experience this so you are not alone. To take the test, you may go to www.beacon.ph/ppdtest

Lagi ako naiinis sa anak ko lately kaka9 months nya lang. Mula kasi nung nagkasakit sya around end ng september. Nahhirapan na sya matulog lagi. Naggising ng alangan na oras. 1am 2am 3am. Haii di ko na alam gagawin ko masisiraan na ko ng ulo kasi kulang na kulang sa tulog e dapat diba mas umookay na tulog nila by this age. Hai di ko alam ang gagawin. Nasstress na ko sakanya lagi ko nasisigawan. I need help please. Below is her sleep sched 3x nap in a day 30mins to 1hour (nakadede/latch habang tulog or gusto karga lagi) 6 30pm to 7 30 pm sleep time 4am to 5am wake up time(ngayon 2am 3am na) Exclusive breastfeeding direct latch no bottle / pacifier Very fussy sya lately haiii

Magbasa pa

Lagi ako naiinis sa anak ko lately kaka9 months nya lang. Mula kasi nung nagkasakit sya around end ng september. Nahhirapan na sya matulog lagi. Naggising ng alangan na oras. 1am 2am 3am. Haii di ko na alam gagawin ko masisiraan na ko ng ulo kasi kulang na kulang sa tulog e dapat diba mas umookay na tulog nila by this age. Hai di ko alam ang gagawin. Nasstress na ko sakanya lagi ko nasisigawan. I need help please. Below is her sleep sched 3x nap in a day 30mins to 1hour (nakadede/latch habang tulog or gusto karga lagi) 6 30pm to 7 30 pm sleep time 4am to 5am wake up time(ngayon 2am 3am na) Exclusive breastfeeding direct latch no bottle / pacifier Very fussy sya lately haiii

Magbasa pa

legit po. bakit nga po kaya, umikli ang pasensya ko mula ng maging nanay ako. especially nitong pangalawang panganak ko. naging maiinitin ulo ko. di lang sa mga anak ko lalo sa toddler ko pati nadin sa husband ko. feeling ko di niya ko naiintindihan. tas everytime magoopen up ako sa kanya, feeling ko nagagalit sya at walang pakealam, pero hindi naman. sobrang caring at maunawain husband ko. ahat ginagawa niya para samin ng mga anak namin. At the end of the day, iiyak nalang ako kasi marerealize ko na overreacting and overthinking lang ako.. niyayakap sila pag tulog at nagsosorry na nadamay sila sa depression ko. PAANO KO PO KAYA MAIAALIS YUNG GANITONG UGALI.

Magbasa pa
4w ago

Hi Abby! Nag-iiba rin kasi tayo sa bawat baby natin. It's another kind of adjustment to have another baby. Our relationships change also. Sometimes what we really need is VALIDATION. Yung mararamdaman mo na hindi ka lang nag-iinarte, papansin, or O.A. If you want, you can join the Beacon Postpartum Club. We meet virtually every month just to hear each other out and receive advice from a therapist + other moms. Check mo if you're interested: www.beacon.ph/postpartum-club