MIL problems, need advice (long post)

Hi mummies Am i the only one who has problems with my MIL? I'm not sure if it's because I'm very young therefore she thinks I'm incapable of taking care of my lo myself. But I'm having my confinement at my own home and my parents r both working but I'm doing fine handling my lo. My mil likes to tell me how i should care for my lo and what I should do when i don't need such advices bc I'm rly doing fine! Currently I'm alternating between my parents home n my in law in months so it's fair to both sides in terms of spending time with my lo and I'm honestly more comfortable at my own home as noone is here to micromanage me.. but my mil isnt happy about that, she is constantly arguing with my husband that i should be living with them instead as the baby is their family surname.. and my mil doesn't respect me when i tell her to not wake my baby up when my lo is sleeping she always carries her n wake her up on purpose and keeps insisting on giving my daughter pacifier when i do not encourage unless really necessary. Problems about my in law house that makes me uncomfortable also is because they always smoke in their home and definitely 2nd and 3rd hand smoke is NOT good for my lo but mil doesnt respect that! she still smokes in the house and in her room!!!!! mil also isnt happy that my husband n i r planning to rent a 2room from hdb bc she wants us to stay with her. What should i do?? i get very depressed whenever I'm at my in law house bc of the things my mil does. and I'm not able to voice up to her.

Anonymous

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My mil tried to pressure me into staying with them as well. She kept telling me older gen dont like the daughter to do confinement in her own house, and promise she can cook for me everyday etc. Im glad i have a supportive hubby. He did not force me and in fact, moved into my house. Im so glad i made that choice. We go back once a week after my confinement but my mil finds it a chore to cook a meal for us. And both his parents smoke in the house too! I told hubby honestly that i do not like it. He told them my concern and now they dont smoke when baby is around. I cant totally ask them to quit. So its a give and take. My parents in law will also try to wake my baby up. My mil will carry him for 5 hours straight except when drinking milk. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Im alone at home during my confinement period. I ordered confinement food. I cant imagine it if i were to do it at his side. Overall, i think its best to talk to ur hubby nicely. Let him know what is bothering you and try to work it out. Cant have everything your way; have to give and take.

Anonymous

5y ago

my husband in a tough position bc of his mother. she always make him very stress n basically my husband n i always argue over this issue - my MIL. hard for him to choose me n baby over his mom...

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