How to handle a mother in law

For me, when she does it for the first time, I will ask my husband to either go handle his mother or I will. If I have to step in, she can forget about her grandchild until she changes. How will my kid think of me when she keeps saying all those nonsense. I was damn timid before I have a kid, so everytime my mil do funny or say hurtful things I just keep quiet. Now, no chance. I remember packing all our stuffs and we ignored and cut her off for 3 months until she came and say sorry. From then on, way better and don’t dare to anyhow. You give me 1 I give you 100. Kids are very smart, they usually know who (grandparents especially) will give in to their 1001 requests regardless while we parents will limit. She is welcomed to babysit her husband 24/7 at her place since he is her child but don’t come and talk nonsense to or snatch my kid. It is MY kid. And tbh, you’re just my mil. I respect you as my husband’s mum but it works both ways. Stand up for yourself 💪🏻.

i feel u mummy .. i am in a similar situation as u .. my mil loves to interfere in my way of parenting and she will always try to snatch bb away frm me if she hears bb crying .. there was one night bb was having night terrors, and she just barge in e room (bb is co-sleeping w me & hub) .. i just tell her off and say she make it look like we cannot handle our kid .. then she just keep quiet .. she has been interfering in our marital affairs since i came home from hosp day 1, take bb away from me to a point i cannot bfeed my bb and in e end, my supply dip 😪 .. from pestering me to switch fm brand (which we have tried a few and bb is not suitable w it), to hvg to buy all my kid neccessities .. my mil has been living w everyone nids to listen to her n will listen .. but sadly she got a daughter inlaw who doesnt likes to listen .. thr r multiple events tht it became an issue btwn me n husb ..

Do you stay with your in-laws? Or is your son closer to them? Because I recall my girl doesn’t like to be left alone with my in-laws and would stick close to me before she was 2yo. So the remarks my mil left was “okok, go find your mummy, I don’t touch you.” But I can also understand maybe they have preference over boy so… if I were to hear such remarks, I’d sarcastically question her if her mil used to say that to her son (your hubby) when he was a kid. Ask how’d she feel if someone said the same thing behind her back. Try to be open minded. After all they are your son’s grandparents and we’ve to respect them so that your son learns to respect elderly too. You have plenty of time to bond with your son. Every kid would love to be around their parents. Don’t think of the bad, think of the good.

if it's me I will ask her why she has to make such comments. and if her answer is anything along the lines of trying to prove my son isn't close to me, I will ask her why she thinks like that. must dig further. maybe she dont want you to be close to your son cos she doesnt like you? or maybe she wasnt close to her son (your husband) so she hopes you'll not have a good relationship with your son? if after telling her I hope for her not to do that, and she still continues trying to make me feel bad or sabotage my relationship with my son, I will limit her from interacting with my son. I rather hire a helper to take care of my child and have a bad relationship with my in-laws than to let them ruin my relationship with my child

Don't take it seriously. Just learn to ignore. Some elderly tend to make such random comments just to poke people. If you get affected, then you are poked indeed. Learn how to let it go and not be affected and believe in yourself. As long as you put in the heart and effort towards your son, your son will feel it and love you too. Just believe in yourself and your son.

you should stay away from such toxic family members for your own mental health and the well being of your whole family dear.

Get your husband to handle her nonsense. I would blast at her when I’m at the peak of my temper

🙏💕