What else, Mother

#justranting When single, ask when going to get married. When got married, when going to bear a child. After 5 years, I was finally blessed with my daughter. Told me don't work la, takecare of baby. Coincidentally, I was just laid off due to covid & found out I was pregnant 2 months later. Always tell me so poor thing to put baby in infant care, later get mistreated how. So I stupidly assume, oh she's going to help takecare of baby with me. Baby arrives. Yes, she helps but mostly looking out when baby is in happy mood. Other than that, I got to figure out everything on my own. Keep telling everyone, ohh they(me&hub) are the ones that really want to have a child. So they takecare of her la. I just see see like that only Do you know how gut-wrenching that is to hear? And telling this openly to neighbours. Like as if you're talking about a pet. You keep telling people you're excited for a grandchild, but your actions say otherwise? And this is your 1st one. I thought you would be more excited. More involved. More nurturing. Just more of everything. Now that I decided to put baby in infant care, you keep pushing me to quickly get a job. It's so frustrating! That's so easy for you to say. You don't know the struggle of me trying to scrimp and save here and there just to ensure my little family is able to make do. I thought you were going to be my village mum. Just as how my grandmothers took care of me when you went to work in the past. If you're not able to do so for me, then don't. Just don't expect me to magically be able to take care of the baby while simultaneously able to find work as well. I don't need more pressure than I already have.

Anonymous

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Hahahaha exactly same sentiment. My first in afternoon K1 and now 5 years old. While my second will soon be in IFC, so I am pretty sure you will know the huge price fee right? My mum was saying why IFC for second. But, if i dont put second in IFC then who want to care for her? Unlike the first, she's grown up and then once she wakes up, breakfast, school, back home, dinner, sleep. My second still needs attention, so if I have two kids with her, wouldn't it be tiring? And I have been working for years. I resign since my second pregnancy due to health problems occur. It has been 11 months of not working since I resign and give birth. Soon putting second in IFC and I am back to work. All I can say, we make love, we give birth but end day we decide how we are gonna arrange the kids. Either baby sitter, CC/IFC or home care (if you have parents that want to care) Otherwise, you do you. Ignore all the -ve comments. It is indeed expensive, but our parents dont wish to care/cannot care/too old/tired, then we better put to CC/IFC. Helps lighten everyone burden at home. And they can cook, do chores, rest that's all. And being in IFC/CC, kids will build routine with napping, school, meal time, etc. So a win win situation.

Chill. Guess its good to have expectation that no one will help. Next time just follow gut feel no need listen to what ur mum say. People also say we so early put baby into ifc but to us, she gets to learn earlier (no doubt ifc is exp). At least in good mood she look out. Isnt it a plan that u n ur hb also want a child too? Unless u all bear one because people ask when… I probably will just let everyting go out n come out of my ear and get myself bothered so much.

TapFluencer

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