I recently gave birth and found out today that my husband has been chatting online with all of his exes these last few weeks. (he hasn't been intouch with them for years). He also failed to mention to them that he is a new dad. When I asked him why, he says he doesn't want to hurt them. Am I unreasonable to feel upset about his behaviour?

First, congratulations! Welcome to parenthood! At this point, I believe you have all the reasons to feel upset with the situation and yes, most importantly with his behaviour. But, this doesn’t mean that you should worry too much. It’s not good for your health especially that you just recently gave birth. My thinking with this situation is that (and probably yours, too) to be fair, I could consider getting in touch with old friends as a normal gesture. But how come he happened to be chatting not just with his 'old friends' but more specifically women whom he had past relationships with? I could consider that fishy but I opt not to. Why? Because it is still best to have an in-depth conversation with him. Yes, Hui Qui could be right that maybe these women have been trying to conceive but still haven’t gotten any success or that these women have problems with their own families that announcing this good news could probably make them feel worst all the more. Best thing to do is to be always think of two side of the story, and that means hearing his but let him be specific. Communication always play a great key in relationships and that is what you should be continuously building.

I don’t think it is unreasonable for you to feel upset. I will be too if I were in your shoes (not to mention those hormones in your system) because I don’t see how telling them that he is a new dad would upset them. Still, not sure of the whole picture (perhaps his exes are trying to get pregnant and have not been getting any success?). Regardless, as long as they are clear that he is married and nothing fishy is going on, I think you shouldn’t think too much into it. Take care of yourself and congrats on becoming a new mum! :)

Your husband is damn cock la. What is the point of him talking to his exes in the first place? Unless it's pregnancy advice, you have all the right to be pissed off. In fact you should let him know you're upset about it. Straight up no nonsense. Because you just had a kid. A KID. HIS KID YOUR KID. If it's any other time okay lah maybe he got reason ah, but this one where got excuse. It's fishy la. Be honest with him and he'll be honest with you. Clear the air. Now you both had a child. Start on the right page.

Just to share my personal experience, my ex husband was exactly like yours and said the exact same thing. What happened? He ended up having an affair with one of them and I filed for a divorce 3 weeks after I gave birth. Have a good talk with him and tell him why it concerns you very much. Otherwise, it's not healthy for your child to grow up in such an environment where his/her father thinks its perfectly okay to hide his real identity from other women.

Talk it out and tell him how you feel. Life goes on my dear, he have to be supportive and sensitive towards you and not the exs'. It's not wrong to continue being friends but it's not right to not be honest about it either. Don't bottle up the feelings.

sorry, but it's a really weird thing when your husband said doesn't want to hurt them?!?! it's okay to feel upset, talk to your husband, tell him this really effects your trust to him. i hope everything will be fine. good luck :)

I would get very angry with my husband, I would feel insulted because he is acting like not proud of me and the baby. Who is he kidding?

iv been there and i can tell you it not going to stop because most men feel unwanted after then gf or wife have is having a baby