Sad New Year's eve

I don't know .... It is overwhelming... The sadness. I am a mom of two. My husband is a seafarer. So kame lng tatlo ng mga anak ko 2 yrs old son and 8 months old daughter. Nilalagnat yung panganay ko 2 days na. Una ubo sipon lng then nilagnat kahapon. Then last night di bumababa lagnat nya. This morning I brought his sa Hospital for CBC with PC and Urinalysis I am so stress. Plus I have no one to help me. Buti nlng yung pinsan ko kinukuha nila and binabantayn bunso ko. By the way I am still breastfeeding her and I am a working mom. And tonight. I don't kniw but I'm so sad.. I don't have the strength na ayusin yung bahay and maghanda. Then I cried, in front of my eldest. I don't know why but i just cried my heart out. He said don't cry mommy and it made me burst into tears even more.. And while I'm writing this I'm still crying.. Can you cheer me up mommies? Thank you