To stay or leave in an unhappy relationship ? 20 weeks pregnant.

I am 32 this year. My spouse to be gambles. Take care of me less than 2 days a week. We don’t stay together. He comes over to my parents place to stay with me 2 days a week. Sometimes he’s non existence . Sleep for the 2 whole day when he’s with me as he gambles till 6am. I am thinking of leaving… but I am scare… till today my parents does not know that I am pregnant. any opinion from single moms? I am pretty lost. Crying to sleep every night.

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This is only the beginning. Wait till you get married. The worse has yet to come. I suggest you leave now. Start a new life over. You will meet someone who will appreciate you and your little one in future. As of now, learn to fend for yourself even if it means being alone. Just to share with you have a 15 month old daughter and am currently pregnant with my 2nd child. My husband is addicted to obscene materials, chats with women and even goes to the extend of hiding apps on his phone just so he can watch porn secretly. This has been going on for 2 years since we got married. Few days ago, he called me a sl*t/wh*re. And other vulgarities just because our daughter vomitted on him. Earlier that day I gave him the ultimatum to clean up his phone since he still keeps all his ex-girlfriends, ex-crushes, ex-scandals, naked women, obscene videos and whatnots. But he’s still doing sh*t behind my back. His laughter is always for his friends, never for me. With me, he is always angry, always moody and does not care about my feelings at all. This time round I made up my mind to seek help from a marriage court. I believe 7 years of this bullsh*t is enough. I am a SAHM but I will find a job after I give birth and fend for me and my kids. It will be tough but I can’t live with this anymore. If you think he’s going to change, think again. Sad to say but some men are just born to be a**holes.

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I rather be alone than stay with a man who avidly gambles AND don't prioritise u or the coming baby. Speaking from someone who seeked divorce from a gambler a decade ago, I found my happiness and strength in my child after he was born. raised him for a good year and a half before I married my current husband. Find a man whom even if he can't shower u with luxurious stuffs, he at least will shower u with endless love and support. Anything with addiction, its not gna be a happy matter. It takes a lot of rehab and time and patience. U don't have to worry abt being a single mom. There's support everywhere, and also Be honest with ur parents, they are closest to u and they would want to see their daughter happy. once they see their grandchild, they might even love the baby a lot more than u know. Chin up dear.

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4mo ago

You will be very ok. Happier and blessed esp when baby is with u. Will be ur strength and motivation. All will be well. #faith

I’m not in your shoes to really understand what you’re going through.. But I’ve been in a similar situation. My ex husband is a womaniser. I wait for too long before deciding to leave him - that’s my only regret now. 1 thing first, ask him to go for gambling addiction counselling. If he refused, file for a divorce. It’s not too bad evening a single mother.. I’m sure you don’t want your child to go through what you’ve been through. You can provide a better life for her, wo him. There’s supports around when you need 1. I’m always here if you need someone. ❤️

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A real man will not make you cry to sleep every night. If he’s doing this before baby comes out won’t it be worst when your baby arrives? he has to get rid of his gambling addiction first as gambling can really ruin a family. I can foresee lots of quarrels in future. Are you able to take care of your child financially and independently? Looks like whether or not he’s there doesn’t make a difference. You may feel like you love him now but overtime that love will fade and you will wonder why you even like him in the first place.

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It is your call, nobody can tell you to stay or leave. weigh your pros and cons before making the decision. Persistent Gambling is going to turn into problem gambling if they don’t recognize it is a problem in time. Potentially this can cause financial distress esp. you have a baby coming along. It depends on what your expectations are towards him as a father and husband, and whether he is willing to meet those expectations. This will ultimately determine whether your marriage is workable. Open and honest Communication is key.

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I was a single mum previously too! My then boyfriend walked out of the relationship. It is definitely tough, but I had PTSD, had several anxiety attacks when I was together with him. The last straw was when I nearly fainted from an anxiety attack when I was on the mrt, and he left me there alone saying I faked it. Choose happiness. You can be happy with your child too. Please don’t live for the sake of others.

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Don’t wait until he is in deep sh*t with thousands of debt only then you want to blame him. We have all read about fathers who are sick in the head and rape their own children. Worse still, sell away your baby. Shivering at the thought of this. Get the hell out girl. If he really loves you and his child, he will make all the effort in the world to win you back again with a clean slate.

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You're 32, don't waste your time on someone like this any longer, you're about to have a baby soon n this baby will be your whole world, do u really wanna take care of 2 kids?

it boils down to what u are prioritising. when the baby is here, will he be helping? or continue to gambles and when cash is tight, what happens?

Leave unless he can change for you