Partner not as excited as I’d expected

How excited are your husbands about your pregnancy and the growing baby in your bellies? Mine doesn’t feel like he’s very excited about it. He doesn’t asks how is the baby doing today, is it kicking, how do you feel today etc.. Are your husbands like that too? Am I over thinking things? Just feel like I’m the only excited one here.

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Mine same like yours. When I showed him the test kit for my 1st pregnancy, he was like “Huh? Really?” That’s all. No hugs, no kisses no nothing. Throughout my pregnancy he didn’t even hold my hand when walking. He even walked ahead of me, leaving me waddling alone all the time. Sometimes I wonder, why did I even get married. My husband is not the kind who would show his emotions even with me. Now on to my 2nd pregnancy, he’s still the same. I yearned for love and attention from my own husband but I know I will never get it. I just seek happiness being with my firstborn and my current pregnancy. For him, I’m just a roommate. He doesn’t bother apologising for his mistakes at all, always on his phone. Go toilet, eat, bathe, sleep, watch TV also on his phone. It’s pointless talking to him cause he will be defensive so now I don’t bother anymore if he wants to die or eat sh*t. Lol. We’ve been married since 2019, known since 2015. Our firstborn is 17 months old and I’m 5 months preggo. Feels like I’m a single mother instead who is living with my baby’s daddy. That’s all. Some men are just wired not to show emotions. Maybe he doesn’t know how to react to your pregnancy, don’t know what to ask, maybe he’s afraid of sounding silly or stupid to you. Men have huge ego, educate him patiently while you still can.

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I think everyone is different when expressing concern, love and affections. Sometimes we may accidentally expect someone to feel or react the same as us thinking that is the benchmark of happiness, excitement and more. But there will be time where we will come to realise not all smiles are equally happy, not all sadness are equally sad. Because we all perceive and understand things differently. Most men don’t know how it feels like for us to feel a little human growing in our belly. What I did was constantly sharing the stages of baby and how I feel everytime. Find time to express the feelings in details to him even when he never ask. i told my husband to download this app to read hahaha. Is like if they dont know much, they dont know what question to ask also. i also share to him some questions I read over here and ask him for his opinion. Let’s try again my dear 🥰

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3y ago

As for me, I downloaded this app on my husband’s phone but it just sat there, never been opened before. Lol. He didn’t even take the initiative to google anything about pregnancy.

how many weeks are you now? mine was not as excited as i would like him to be, during my first and early second trimester. once the baby starts to move/ when he felt baby’s movements, i could tell that he was beginning to be excited about baby, talking to baby etc. previously i was the one talking to baby every night and asking him if he wants to say goodnight to baby. now that he felt baby’s movements, he will talk to baby every night before sleeping don’t think so much as i read an article that husband will only feel that things are getting real at the later stage of pregnancy or when baby is out!

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3y ago

I’m at 21 weeks now. Hmm I’m the only one talking to the baby now haha. I’ll even have to move his hand on my belly for him to feel the baby kicking, but he never initiates. Yeah I believe so too. It’s impossible for men to understand how it’s like for us growing a little baby in our bellies. Maybe at a later stage, reality will finally sink in for him 🤣

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Hi Chloe, I guess men express themselves differently.. Mine is neither here nor there. I’m in my 3rd trimester & often whine that I’m tired all day. He will just brushed it off & tells me not to be lazy. Get up, walk about, exercise bla bla.. Told me many times, he won’t want to be in the labour ward to watch “it” coz he’s scared 🙄 But as I’m nearing my EDD, he’s the one that gets all excited about getting a cot, pram, playmat, etc. So yah.. just let him be. He’ll probably show his affections & concerns differently. 😉😉

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My husband was the first who felt ready and wanted a baby before me. haha I know he is excited at that point, but he does not show it expressively daily. He also didn't ask how's the baby/ baby kicking or how I am unless I am visibly uncomfortable or struggling. But there are fleeting moments. I would catch him staring at my belly with a happy glint in his eye. Some men just express themselves differently. Different love language. 😊

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we had a surprise pregnancy and my husband hates surprises. so for most part, he was struggling to accept it. I did not get to enjoy the whole process with him. did the scans, virtual baby showers and baby shopping on my own. but he support me and paid for everything. it was only til my 6th month that he changed and accepted it. Now, our LO is 18mos, and doesn't like hanging with him unless we are outside the house 😆

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maybe ur husband doesnt show it but when baby is out, he will definitely be over the moon. probably nervous and dont know what to do either

My partner doesn’t ask all these as well. End up we went separate ways. He just wasn’t that into having kids nor share any responsibilities .

3y ago

I’m sorry to hear that. He’s probably not ready for kids and all that responsibilities that comes with having kids.

yes. he is not as excited as me throughout the pregnancy. but he cares more on my well-being than the baby in the belly.