Frustrated. I just need to rant.
Ever since i was diagnosed with high risk pregnancy, my husband has been hustling even harder for the family. We have 3 kids n a helper and other expenses. Before i was pregnant with 4th, i could still help out working on weekends and doing deliveries. After a major bloodshow, i was bound to bedrest for almost a month. Husband has been working everyday n coming back late. Today we had an argument bcoz 1)he was very late to help me deliver an item. 2)he came back furious because our 1st daughter kept calling n texting him non stop while he was typing something serious on his hp n got disrupted. The kids came out of their room so excited to see him home only to be reprimanded. My heart ache for my child. He went on n on how bad his day was. How much time he was wasting just by coming bck home only for me to tell him item can deliver tmr. So i asked him now u come back u angry with who? With us? In disbelief. I know my child shouldnt have annoyed him like that. But why is he venting his anger from work to home??? I really dont like it la. Then amidst everything, he said something like "im on the road the whole day. If nvr scold and discipline now then when? Wait till i die is it?" Ever since i stopped helping out, he mentioned the word die so many times. "Work until die" Its like as if we r driving him to work to his death. Doctor told me i cannot drive. But after so many arguments, i really think i should just get back to do some work n do my own deliveries. Im so sick of being useless at home. Its not that i dont appreciate my husband hardwork. But everytime when we argue, i feel very guilty for making him work so hard for the family. This pregnancy has really tested us in so many ways.