Ask the expert series: Tips to handle your baby’s night wakings?

Thank you so much, Amber. Will heed to your advice.

You can start sleep training after the age of 4 months, and the most effective sleep training methods are the ones that involve helping your baby unlearn sleep associations they can’t independently manage (e.g. rocking or feeding) and learn new sleep associations (e.g. routine, or a comfortable blanket). This process can be emotional for parents, so please seek supports and look after yourself in the process. Unfortunately there are no quick fix as this is a learning process and the duration can vary from a few days, to a week or two. Regardless of whether you’ve recently moved house, are moving house, or are traveling, maintaining consistency in your baby’s bedtime routine can be very helpful in helping your baby settle for sleep.

Hello! I’m assuming you mean she cries when she wakes with her eyes closed? Your daughter may have learnt to associate the pacifier with sleep, and therefore uses it to soothe herself to sleep. Depending on how you feel about the use of a pacifier and whether she is able to reach out for a pacifier independently, you could place her pacifier within her reach in her cot. However expect some resistance (i.e. crying) if you do intend to let her try this, as she would need time to learn to obtain her pacifier instead of expecting it to be placed in her mouth. You could start by guiding her hand to the pacifier in the initial stages and gradually decreasing support as necessary.

This is a great question! Ensuring your well being is really important when managing your baby’s needs. When we are rested and have our needs met, we have more resources to be patient with our children. If your baby is struggling to return to sleep at night, you can consider sleep training, to help your baby learn to put him/herself back to sleep. Sleep training is a process that involves your whole family, so it will be helpful to discuss your plans. If you do decide on sleep training, there are different methods, and the most effective ones are those that involve helping your baby unlearn sleep associations they can’t independently manage (e.g. rocking or feeding) and learn new sleep associations (e.g. routine, or a comfortable blanket) that they can manage. Sleep training can feel very stressful, so choose a day when you don’t have important commitments and when your baby is well. It can feel even harder if you do not have support. I would highly recommend speaking to your partner

This will be dependent on the comfort of your family, but it is recommended for babies to sleep in the same room (but separate beds to reduce risk of SIDS) with their parents for the first year of their life. Thereafter, if you wish to transition your child to a different bed or room, maintaining the usual sleep routines would be helpful to help your child learn the new sleeping arrangements. This can take a few days to a week or two, depending on your child’s needs.

This is tricky and I remember being as quiet as I could to prevent waking my child (to no avail at times)! However, keeping the room dim, using warm wipes, and minimising noise can be helpful to minimise the levels of arousal of your baby. Tricky if there’s a big mess! If your baby does awaken, try to maintain calmness and avoid playful interaction with your child. Maintain the same routines in settling your baby back to sleep, and consider sleep training if your baby is above the age of 4 months. Baby’s awakenings would also mean your sleep is disrupted. Therefore, please look after yourself, and take turns if possible.

Open communication in expressing your requests and needs would be very helpful to let each other know your needs. I would suggest having a conversation on an agreed plan when you are both calm. You can take turns, or divide responsibilities, depending on what works best for you. When we feel supported by a loved one, these awakenings can feel a lot more bearable. If your baby is well and healthy, you can consider sleep training after your baby is 4 months old. Again, open communication and agreement would be essential as sleep training can feel stressful in the initial few days.

If your baby is below 4 months old, your baby would likely need your help to soothe them. However, you could still develop good habits in the form of routines to help your baby learn to expect sleep. If your baby is above 4 months old, you can start sleep training to help your baby learn positive sleep associations. Sleep aids are items that your baby can use to associate with sleep. Aids that your baby cannot manage themselves may not be helpful. These may include things like rocking, feeding, or switching on a white noise machine. Helpful sleep aids could include things like a comfortable blanket or lovey your baby can reach out for.