Scared of birth and the life after

I think most moms get over the pain of birth faster than gg through the trauma of first few months post-partum. I'm not sure abt natural delivery as I did elective csect. My boy's birth was an uneventful smooth one but I had postnatal blues due to the stress of breastfeeding. I had a low supply and my big 3.7kg baby couldn't stop wanting to latch. Decided to supplement with formula but I still cldnt get over the guilt and still tried all sorts of ways to increase my supply. Spent so much on lactation bakes etc and tt made me gain so much weight. I lost 12kg during confinement but gained more than tt aft tt due to trying so hard to increase supply. Managed to increase a bit frm eating Legendairy Milk supplements but I still suffered frm postnatal blues despite getting all the help from my mom. She even felt so helpless seeing me cry everytime I breastfeed. I couldn't help being super annoyed with my husband whenever he sleeps even tho he too helped ard with the housework. I kept thinking how unfair tt he doesmt need to breastfeed and go through all the hardwork. Outsiders or rather my Hubby's relatives made it worse when they visit and said baby was so fair and cute and looks so much like the father, right in front of my face! I really felt like telling them off but I had to just suck it up. It only got better aft 4 months when my baby start to sleep longer and cld sleep abt 4-5 hours straight without wanting to latch and i cld finally also ignore whatever ppl said abt the baby. Currently pregnant with the 2nd. I'm not sure how it'll be like but I feel I'm more mentally prepared and really, keep telling yourself that you are good enough. Really true to just ignore whatever ppl says because post-pregnancy, your emotions gonna go haywire but pls have your lifeline and someone whom u can really count on. For me, it was my mom who was my strength and comfort and my sister who also helped to keep me sane.

truth be told i felt exactly the same as you before i delivered. super worried about the pain and what would go wrong delivery day and life with a baby. during that time i tried my best not to overthink. whenever i feel the panic, i wrote down messages to my baby in the phone notes. that made me feel better. i also share my worries to the husband so that he knows when he needs to step up when i am feeling vulnerable. my husband told me to focus on thinking of what i will missed the most when baby is here. one of which was going to the movie theatre. so then we went to watch movie 2 days before my c section. dont just think of the bright side, do things that help you to relax too. i am currently two weeks post partum via elective c sect. the pain is bearable i can assure you. what matters more to me was that baby is safe and healthy. i can focus on rest and recovery bcos of my confinement nanny now. so i have unlocked new fears on what life will be like after nanny leaves.. as for the heavy responsibility and commitment that our brains wired us to overthink as first time mom.. my nanny saw how eager i was to learn everything. she told me to take it slow. it is not as daunting and scary if you just take a day at a time and master a new skill at a time. just know that you are doing great as a first time mom. focus on caring for yourself so that you are well enough to care for your baby. press on you can do it too! you are not alone in this journey.

Don’t overthink on what’s ahead of you, take one step at a time. I was so stressed about the pain of giving birth but turns out it didn’t hurt at all for me so all my tears and worries are wasted 😂. The traumatising part during postpartum was the lack of sleep due to breastfeeding, pain from mastitis and not understanding what the baby is crying for.This is where any help (especially your husband) is needed, they can help to offload night feeds to let you rest and have your sanity. It is totally normal to feel frustrated, especially when you don’t have enough sleep. Breastfeeding I am a low supply mum so I struggled as I wanna quickly transit baby to full bm. I slowly let go and watch my show during pumping, drink more water and take more supplements and my supply slowly went up. So if you intend to bf/pump, don’t stress. Mixed feeding is fine too! Trust yourself, step by step, day by day. You’ll be able to understand baby’s cries and needs, accompany them to grow and achieve milestones. It will get easier and realize it’s actually the same routine everyday. You’ve got this! 😊💪🏻

Honestly i'm like you too. But once your baby comes out you will feel the happiest mother ever!! 🙂 First Month you need to be mentally strong because your mind and body feel exhausted and not enough sleep but as days passes by when you see your child growing up you will missed those moments when they baby. Now i'm pregnant with my second child at 30wks! 🤣 Feeling scared of labour still never goes away! But at the same time I feel excited to meet my baby. Our partner must be positive, helpful & supportive to help you when in need after labour. ❤️

Take things one at the time, giving birth not so bad afterall,as for me i went through emergency csect. the fear we all once had and went through it, in the end what matters most for all mummies is the health of our little ones. once the baby delivered the pain and fear we once feared gone. However the reality came in when baby arrived. All i can say, it takes the whole village to support us emotionally, mentally and physically. Do not hesitate to get help if needed. Our mental health is important too. So husbands plays a big role too.

Yes, first two months are tough. So you can plan ahead. Who is going to help taking care of baby and who is going to settle the house chores. You need to rest during the confinement period. But again, who knows? Maybe you are going to have an easy baby :) About delivery pain, I cope with mine by opting for c sect. Speak with your gynae. All the best!

one step at a time. I nearly suffered from post natal depression due to stress of taking care of baby and finances. just talk to hubby and get support from him and your family. learn slowly. it's hard to get used to a new being our lives.

Just think about you’re going to see your LO soon! And take one thing at a time. Enjoy the present. I know it sounds so cliche or easy but that is what it takes.

I feel the same way!

🙏💕