Miscarriage

Hi to all.. here i have no qns to ask but just sharing that i just had a miscarriage due to the pinkish spotting i had. The pinkish spotting turns to a bright red n then it get to heavy flow. And cramping too. At the end early today i went to the E&E. I didn’t know how miscarriage looks like. I didn’t know that i miscarriage already when taking the urine. I just felt a lump came out and thought it was a blood clot. To my surprise when the doctor to the scan, they couldn’t find my sac. Then that i know the piece of lump in the toilet bowl was my sac, my baby.. this is my second miscarriage this year. I dont know why is this happening to me. I’m not strong to handle this for the second time.. why is it has to be me.. i cant handle this..