Upset and heart brokem

Back to work after 3months of taking care of my baby Upon returning home my baby is happy to see me she will smile. But when feeding time she will scream and cry till mil take over. When sleeping time she will scream and cry too till my mil take over. Night time I take care of baby .. She will wake up a few times keep kicking. .. tried feeding. Her but she will skip her milk doesn't wan to drink .. den she will falls back to sleep. Feeling she is rejecting me wad can I do ? And I dislike my mil saying... U don't like mummy huh why don't let mummy carry? And keep saying I always carry baby, baby will get use to it. No ppl is free to always carry. And keep mention to hire a helper so she is free to carry her the whole day. I don't knw but is anyone facing this kinda issue ? My mil and fil is staying with us .. daytime she is the caregiver. Night time I am the caregiver. And I don't have a caring husband basically he only play with baby for awhile den he will go back and do his stuff.. and always mentioning I am too over protective towards my baby . I feel upset and broken. I don't understand y I have this type of husband ... He is not ready to be a dad ? He always tell me findin ways to earn money for baby. Or am I wrong? Am I wrong to feel all this ? Sometimes I just feel like leaving and I feel that mayb being a single mum is much more better .. I can decide and won't be judge by in laws by husband.. y must we have a family ? His mum always say if this house no her we will die -.- she does all the housework I am grateful but if really no in-laws I feel mayb we will be more independent. In-laws doesn't have a house. Feel my husband is not ready to be a dad Being thru iui,IVF,and finally got pregnant and finally csect and finally baby is here y do I feel that my husband is still like a kid. He keep on complaint that I stick to baby..and over protective .. am I? On the verge on breaking down I just feel like walking away and lead my own life with my baby. A new mum which is lost in the middle of the woods...what should I do? Am I wrong?

Anonymous

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Hello my dear mommy, I just had a baby and is almost 3months old too. i too stay with parents in law but of course not all situations are the same as yours but I’m sure certain times I felt same as you. Some difference between us was that I figured I might have postnatal depression, I felt depressed since day 0. Of course I wouldn’t say I was the one that sort of made myself upset and that everyone else were right and I was just crazy or sick. husband and families play a big part in our postnatal journey, when they can’t understand well enough and to be more caring and careful with me can lead me into more depressive state. Believe me, I was almost crying everyday and felt helpless. But one day I decided that all these things I need to have them communicate properly, I told my husband and family that I feel I’m having postnatal depression and that I get triggered very easily. When I opened up to get help, my loved ones will then understand how to help me. Of course I’m not saying you are just like me, but take a step back and don’t like your emotion cloud your judgement and rush into making decisions. Anyway one thing for sure is, baby always know who is their mother. They will never reject their mommy!!! So don’t feel it that way! For all the things your mil say, sometimes I get it from mine too. Then I learnt that, they probably just want to let you know they can help you and as they are also staying with you. Some people talk mindlessly, when my baby shouts… sometimes they will say the baby wants their ah ma… lol! At first I also dont like it then I slowly understood baby will know who is the mother and always closer to the mom even when you don’t take care of baby as much.

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