I have a friend whose elder has special needs too and it took her quite long to have another one and he was ok.
I put myself in your situation and I think I may opt for ending this pregnancy because with two the efforts and drain on parents will be a lot. Especially if you say your husband doesn't help out much, having another one may make matters worse and it won't be good for both kids to grow in a stressed relationship.
Also after both you and your partner pass away, the burden is on the younger sibling to take care of the older one. I won't wanna give my child this kind of stress.
Also like you say there is a risk of the second one having the same genetic problem. To me the cons outweigh the pros.
To be responsible I think you and your husband need to take precautive measures in future so that you won't end up pregnant again
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