Being Called Stupid for Not Taking HL

Hi mommies, just needed a place to rant. I am currently 39 weeks pregnant and still working. For your info, I'm under subsidised route in KKH. So I don't see a fixed gynae. I work in the education industry, so I do not have annual leave. Taking leave means I short-change my students and colleagues, which I hate to do. I also do not want to spend my maternity leave for prenatal and prefer to save them to spend time caring for my baby. A "friend" who gave birth recently had taken 2 months worth of Hospitalisation Leave straight before her dleivery despite not having any issue with her pregnancy or health. Her private gynae gives in to her requests and her workplace does not question her. So yesterday she contacted me and asked me why I am still working. I said I'm still well and not given HL so I'll just go to work. Plus staying active should help in the delivery. She laughed at me about the staying active part (she believes pregnant woman should not do anything at all) and for taking a bus to work instead of taxi, then called me stupid for going to a public hospital as they are stricter when issuing HLs. I'm not saying one cannot take HL to rest, but I'm just annoyed that I'm being called stupid and looked down on for saving money and going to a public hospital by someone who abuses the system and the kindness of her workplace/colleagues. Sorry just needed to rant.

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I think your fren is the ignorant one. Public hospital does give hospital leaves even if one is a subsidized patient. I dun feel anything lower as a subsidized patient ~ i was a private turned subsidized patient in kkh too and i was very well taken care by the staff there too! After the experience I actually didn’t think i need to go private for my future pregnancies! Anyway kudos to you, u are doing good and take care of yourself too! I dun think it’s a matter of stupidity at all. I’m proud that you din try to take an easier way out but still maximizing ya services to your work. Wishing u well and smooth delivery:)

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A friend shldn't make you feel tt way! Ignore her comment! Different ppl has different treshold level. I'm a teacher too. I hve a colleague who was so active tt she worked till she felt labour pains in sch. Really admire her dedication! She was in private and didn't want to take HL because she was feeling fine. Unfortunately for me I had chronic asthma during my pregnancy so my gynae gave me 1 mth HL. She's not responsible for your decision, be it to take private or public route. It's not her who's delivering your baby or paying for your fees. So you do you! Ignore the toxic ppl in your life!

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First off - she sounds like a toxic friend, please cut her out of your pregnancy life. Second - you are right, it’s important to keep active even if it becomes uncomfortable during the last few weeks of pregnancy. It prevents your muscles from weakening and stamina from dropping, both important if you’re considering a natural birth. If you have difficulties performing physical tasks at work, then insist on HL. But otherwise working and daily tasks such as taking the bus is completely fine and beneficial to your pregnancy

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We all know that one or two "friends" who is a total moron. But those friends may have other values beside those occasional slip of mouth. If your friend does has that other merits I spoke of, just mentally struck her with a rod and imagine screaming some profound words at her and calmly walk off. Opt to recontact her only when you feel game for it on better days. If your friend is labelled a friend for no good reason, then we will all encourage you to make your thoughts heard before you walk off for good.

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Dear mom to be, I know how it feels like. I went through kkh subsidised too and I’m in the education sector too! I just gave birth in Jan 2022 :) I took a week of MC from poly and gynae to rest. And yes, some ladies do not understand the choices we make. Best is to just not to reply them or just nod and walk away. Nothing is important as of now except for your mental health and the health of you and baby. Hugs! And May your labour be a smooth one!

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Yeah.. Agreed, this shall be the last conversation. I had 2 weeks HL at week 30 due to high fever, I feel so bored at home after discharged and even worked a little bit at home to keep myself alive. Doing nothing doesn't mean doing good. I am at week 37 tomorrow, and I still insist to walk and swim alternate days even ppl telling me should stop exercising. I just do what I feel right.

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It's not true that private gynae is easier to give HL. I went for private gynae and she also refused to give HL as she said I was well and able to continue my regular activity and it is actually unethical for gynae to randomly give HL for someone who is well. Keep you daily life active, definitely may help in your labour! Smooth delivery! :)

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every pregnancy is different, everyone also different.. she sounded very much of a toxic person and a selfish person.. who is she to call someone stupid.. everyone has their own decision and planning.. keeping active indeed is good if the body allow.. please try to get this person out of your life if possible, as she is not respecting you..

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Please ignore your friend! You are not stupid! I worked all the way just like you up till the day i got admitted just that for me i was wfh. I have the same thinking as you as i dun understand if there is no issue with the pregnancy why take hl! For my case getting Hl is like a nightmare to me coz i cannot dont work 🤭

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Wow, you need to cut this ‘friend’ out of your life. You’re not being stupid, you’re being professional, considerate, ethical and kind to your students and colleagues. Which is MUCH BETTER than whatever she’s doing. You’re being a better person and she wants to shame you for it. Double shame on her!

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