Any good response for "wah you've gained weight"?

I'm not one of those lucky mums who can shed off the post-pregnancy weight gain. Post-partum depression hit me hard, so staying fit on top of taking care of my baby without helper or family's help just wasn't on top of my list. Just went to a wedding and the first thing my inconsiderate aunt and uncle who haven't seen me in years since covid was "wow you've put on weight", in front of other relatives. It was embarrassing and hurtful. It's not something that can just be ignored and then move on from. I was self conscious throughout the wedding dinner, and I am already dreading upcoming Christmas and Chinese New Year family gatherings where they may be more of such unnecessary comments from others. Realistically I will not be able to go back to pre-pregnancy weight in time. So...***Are there any sassy witty mums here with a good, helpful comeback?*** A response that lets them know it's not okay to shoot their mouths off this way?? I don't wish to just smile and nod and say "ya lor", then feel embarrassed and self-conscious throughout the gathering. If your advice is to ignore, no that's not practical. If a person says to you "Hey you've gained weight!", you can't just treat the person as invisible and pretend you didn't hear. You can't just stay silent, you also can't ignore and just walk off. To those advising to slim down by doing exercises or to face the truth, yeah sure don't worry, am in the process, but that's not the reply suggestion I'm seeking here. Thank you in advance for those with practical advice (instead of "just ignore")!!!!!🤗

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As I grow up I started to give no f to relatives because they don’t seem to know any manners. Abusing their seniority and talking nonsense forgetting that I will grow up from cub to tigress lol. Anyways I would totally tell them (below is one of the nicer replies I usually do. My replies are usually 一针见血), “Ya man, my husband fed me well, but why you look like you got no money to eat/no wonder xxx look like anytime wind blow will fly. Let me know if you need rice. Oh dear… 😌” then I’ll proceed to tell my kid “Next time when you grow up you must remember that you got parents to teach you manners.” That’s what I always do to my relatives and mil who can’t keep their mouth shut or talk nicely, indirectly way of directing my message across to their face. 99% of the time they will either paiseh or feel offended but that’s really not my problem 😉 After all they probably forgotten that I only see them how many times a year? Tbh even if any melon tofu happen to them, it don’t really bother me so I totally wont bother about their feelings after hearing my words lol 😙 人不犯我,我不犯人。人若犯我、斩草除根。

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For me, I will not recommend to ignore though, cause the more you ignore, the further they will take. You can try responding: Are you providing meals for me? If not, why you bother so much? You mean I look healthier? Thanks for your compliment. Do you want t sponsor my gym classes? I honestly don't mind. For me, I usually shut them up by talking back rudely. Otherwise they wont know when to stop, especially those relatives Im not close with. Often, my parents got complaints from them that I am rude, but my parents will tell them not to comment on me instead. I used to have an incident when I was younger. I greeted the relatives but they were so busy that they didn't hear. They complained saying I got bad family manners for not greeting them. I instantly shouted back, if you have bad hearing, dont expose to everyone your hearing is bad, and push the blame to people's family manners.

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2y ago

hahahahha that's witty!!!!!

Hope you are a Chinese and understand the below 😅 “我吃你家大米了啊,你管我” “哇,你也是老了hor。 白头发这么多” “哎呀,没有啦。我怕我瘦下来太美,站你旁边差距太远,为你着想罢了” “哎...家里条件好,实在是没办法” “哦,是咯。可是我只是胖着玩玩的,但你却笨得很认真啊” But I think I since she’s a relative, the last one can’t be use. 😅 I’ve been a big size girl my whole life and these are all the come back I’ve accumulated over the years. Some for friends and some for relatives. Hope these can help you!

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2y ago

i like the first line! hahaha

Mummy!!! You know i have relatives calling me "KING KONG", "HAIYO SO BIG AH YOU CONFIRM BABY BIG LA!" when im now at my 3rd Trimester.. im standing at 170cm, my feet size is at 42, huge bones, but u know what, my reply is.. "yaaaa this king kong la is giving you all your nephew very soon." I learned 1 thing during my pregnancy journey... JUST IGNORE AND BE HAPPY WITH UR FAMILY!!! At the end of the day its OUR BODY, OUR BABY, OUR FAMILY, OUR LIVES... as long as we are healthy, baby is healthy and stay fit, god willing everything will go well!!! Sooo heads up and rock that body mummy!!!! ❤️❤️❤️

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TapFluencer

If the aunty not so close, can say: "Ya! Was about to remind you your grave is calling for you too! Eh? Wrong comeback ah?" - make sure u poker face then turn and walk away. If its close aunty, then smile and say, "Ya la... My hb feeds me enough. What to do with all these excess love I'm getting..." then turn and walk away. I personally don't take into offence but I do understand it feels so sucky to hear it ever so often. My usual reply is the 2nd one cos the ones that comment on my weight is always those closer to me which, I never understand why they feel the need to 'remind' me of my weight.

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Not very sassy but I'd call her on it and tell her what she said was inappropriate, none of her business and ask her not to comment on your weight or what you're eating again. If she continues, repeat “stop” and/or say “if you don’t stop I am leaving this conversation until you can stop commenting on my body” But if you want less obvious ones. - Yes. And ...? - Thank you, I wasn't sure anyone would notice. How kind of you to comment. - Thank you, Captain Obvious. Are you going to inform me that the sky is blue and water is wet too?

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2y ago

hahahahahha I don't think I'd have to courage to simply tell an elder relative "stop". your less obvious lines are cool! but hard to translate to mandarin version hahaha.

Let me try.. “If you’ve nothing better to say then don’t say” “Wow you’ve aged so much” “Wow you also have gained weight!” The second one sounds a bit bad but I guess it’s to make them feel how you felt. I’m also taking care of baby alone without help.. My back aching like mad and sometimes “heart very tired”. Jiayou!

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2y ago

Wow i like the second one!! Hahaha! Im 30 weeks and dont like the fat feeling tooo.

I will just answer “Yeah! I did! Goes to show my husband is taking good care of me and making me happy.” And then just smile. Usually that will just end the conversation 😂 cause they will expect you to react differently usually.

2y ago

I think most of the time they expect you to take it graciously. 😂 cause they are elderly and they can get away with it. But I can’t be bothered to say them. Cause these people will just get offended or upset with any sarcastic remarks anyway. So I just smile and say what I did. They will usually just accept it and say good that I am happy 😂

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I would just respond back with a sob story on how my weight gain has made me miserable and if they had any advice on how to lose weight - my hope is this will make them feel bad or make them regret starting this conversation.

2y ago

yesssssss I'm not trying to start an argument with them either, I just want to let them know their words hurt and they should not be going around throwing hurtful remarks. I don't get why anyone would think "wow you're so fat now" is a good conversation starter.

"Yeah I know. I was pregnant for 9 months and gave birth some time back. Its very normal to gain some weight. How did you not know about it? Oh I'm sooo sorry! i forgot that you're ageing!"