Good side of motherhood

Im a ftm expecting my child soon and the people around me and social medias are all filled with the negative and scary side of motherhood after birth. The depression, the loss of sleep, the change of body etc and that made me very scared and demoralised. I know its all true and ill be experiencing all that but wow is it all bad side is my life going down the drain after having a baby. Will i ever be myself again. Can mummies enlighten me the good bright side of being a mother, especially with a newborn. 😣 #firsttimemom

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To be honest, they are not scary. It’s just that as a FTM, everything changes with a newborn and we don’t have enough time to adapt. Everything is thrown to us all at once which makes it overwhelming for us. The start of your journey (confinement), your husband’s support is very important. We have to work together while I learn and adapt to the routine before you go back to work. The loss of sleep is due to breastfeeding (regardless of latch or pump) rather than baby. For body changes, it’s very normal and you have to give it some time to go back. Just eat well, rest well and you’ll be back in shape in no time before you even realize it (Took me 8 months to go back to PPW). Not everything will be on the bad side, once you’ve overcomed and got used to waking up frequently, you’re pretty much good. And if breastfeeding is really taking a toll on your sanity, it’s very okay to formula feed baby. I won’t tell you all those “think abt your baby Blabla” because tbh it’s does not help anything (maybe tell myself ok cannot scold cannot flare up, they are just babies). Get support from your husband, split up the duties (eg if you pump he wash, take turns to wake up to feed baby if bottle feeding), in the meantime, adapt and get used to the routine. Take one step at a time, if you need help, get help. It’s okay. 😊

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1y ago

Thank you mummy ❤️

Hello! Firstly, congratulations on your pregnancy and I hope everything is going well. I just wanted to share my experience - it took us 5 years to have our baby earthside and I thought I was very prepared. But wow newborn days were brutal. To be honest it was an absolute shock to my body, and we had no village to help except our confinement nanny who left after confinement was over. We were completely on our own. In hindsight, I think hormones played a huge part (which I recognised too at that time but I didn't know how to deal and I had no time to deal). I think I only started enjoying motherhood when baby was older past 6 months. I know the above sounds scary and yes it was scary BUT it WILL get better. My baby is now turning 18m soon and it's a joy watching him (I'm a SAHM) grow up. So I just want to tell you that no matter what and no matter how you feel, you're never going to be alone. It is true that motherhood / parenthood changes us but we'll just be new and better versions of ourselves even if it takes time, I believe. This too shall pass 💪🏻❤️❤️

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I’m a ftm too, my baby is almost 3 months now, I must say, the first two months were tough. I had terrible baby blues, cried everyday, every time the baby cried, I would worry and begin to panic. Tried breastfeeding but didn’t work out so well, and with ppl asking am I breastfeeding, it’s stressful. Sleep deprived is real. Get lots of sleep right now cause you’re going to miss sleeping through the night. And my baby was colicky, so for a week or two, I began to feel nervous at sunset, baby would start to cry for 2-3hours. It was overwhelming. What helped me was my family, they are my rocks and pillars. Get support that you may need to get through. Is it going to be better? Yes. Now my baby no longer cries at sunset and she is beginning to sleep for longer hours at night, meaning more sleep for us too. It’s tough but her smiles somehow make me feel better. All the best!

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Agree with all the other mummies comments. It's not all a bed of roses for sure. My baby is 8 months old and I'm still sleep deprived. The first 3 months were tough for me. Not going to scare you but it's good to have realistic expectations. It also depends on the temperament of your baby whether baby sleeps well, is fussy or not. Remember to be patient with yourself. It takes time to learn how to take care of the baby, to lose the pregnancy weight and have life go back to a new normal. It will never be the same again. On the positive side, your baby will bring you and your family lots of joy and you'll be surprised to learn how you can love another human being so much that you're willing to sacrifice so much. It truly is a joy watching the baby grow week by week, month by month. Enjoy the journey and be kind to yourself. All the best mummy!

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Agree with all the other mummies comments. It's not a bed of roses for sure. My baby is 8 months old and I'm still sleep deprived. The first 3 months were tough for me. Not going to scare you but it's good to have realistic expectations. It also depends on the temperament of your baby whether baby sleeps well, is fussy or not. Remember to be patient with yourself. It takes time to learn how to take care of the baby, to lose the pregnancy weight and have life go back to a new normal. It will never be the same again. On the positive side, your baby will bring you and your family lots of joy and you'll be surprised to learn how you can love another human being so much that you're willing to sacrifice so much. It truly is a joy watch the baby grow week by week, month by month. Enjoy the journey and be kind to yourself. All the best mummy!

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yes 1st 2 mths is hard as I felt my life completely changed. we do not have confinement nanny or any family help so I stopped work (am a self-employed prior) to take care of bb full time. as we are 1st time parents, initially hubs and I will tear when bb vomit and worry at the slightest thing we see. but as time goes, u will adapt well and be able to know yr bb patterns, things will naturally work out fine :) my piece of advice, dont "hear" too much from others , every bb behaviour is different so dont compare yours, however if you dont know anything, ask . ask a few ppl to see which method u wanna deploy dont let anyone's words get to u, especially breastfeeding , can provide we provide, otherwise formula is also good. it doesnt make us bad mommies ya :)

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Hi there, first and foremost preparations is all u need. Prepare to be a mother and all. As everyone understands that our duty is above the daddy. So be prepared for any challenges. And trust me, now u may feel odd about it, but everything will take place naturally when it comes. Tell urself, believe in urself and watever u do is for the best for ur family.🫰

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My chant for the first 2 years when things gets rough was always, “this is just a phase”. Once you are a mummy, you will realise that your body and brain will be wired differently. You can survive on little to no sleep and still give your all to your LO. Enjoy the little moments, take lots of photos cos time really flies with them. All the best mummy :)

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