Hi i need to rant about my husband . I find him very selfish and lazy. Our relationship went downhill so much after having a baby. Firstly it all started on the first night I came home from hospital. The confinement lady told him to get somethings and instead of going out in the day to buy he went out around midnight and took the chance to have supper with his friends and shop at ntuc . I had a c sect so I needed someone to help me up to pump milk and he wasn't around. After that in the first few months he will often sleep until noon even though our baby wakes at 8am. As we sleep with air con on, when I need to bathe the baby I need to move the baby to another room to change her. I tried to endure at first and hope he will change on his own but of course he did not. So I told him my frustrations. I think he did change in terms of waking a bit earlier to help. But he still sleeps late. It is not as if he helps a lot in the day or wakes at night to help me feed baby but yet he still wakes up after me and takes nap as and when during the day. He is permanently sleeping if I allow him to. Once a week I let our baby stay over at his mom's place so that we have some me time. He will arrange many activities during this one day and then I won't have time to do my chores like pack baby's stuffs or wash her things. If he help out maybe it is better but once baby is not around he will go back to his usual sleeping habit. He says he wants me time with me but he wakes up so late everyday and if we go out with friends where is the me time? We didn't even have any intimacy for a long time. Every time I am online searching for deals for diapers and wet wipes he is snoring away. But when it comes to arranging sessions to eat and play with his friends he takes the initiative I am so sick of him!!!

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Have you asked your hubby what he thinks of baby and his feelings? Is he afraid that he cannot be a good father therefore using sleep as a way of escape? Does he feel neglected? For all you know he might be jealous that baby gets all the attention and he is just a nobody; only when he is with you and his friends then he feels his presence matters and he exists.

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