What is one thing you close one eye about your helper?

Question

I heard from people that getting helper have to close one eye for certain things and just bear with it. Even though there’s physical help, it’s mentally draining to have a helper in reality. Got to keep watching her with my baby. Worrying if she will do any bad to us. Telling her how to do things time and again. Reminding her this and that. Seeing her attitude. Sometimes I wish I didn’t need a helper, but circumstances call for it.Is it so hard to find a very good helper nowadays? Is it normal that we just have to close one eye and bear with it for 2 years? Please share your helper woes so I don’t feel so alone 😢

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

For me, if helper needs to take care baby, expect that household chores/dinner won’t be done if there are no extra help. Because even I myself cannot do both as there is only that much time in a day. I can accept household chores not done but personal hygiene is priority since she will be handling baby. You have to decide helper’s priority is for housework or baby, if so, focus on one. I’m not sure about your household situation or rather how your helper is like but if I have to constantly repeat and teach the same thing over and over (since I can teach you over and over I might as well do it myself?), despite that still have to tahan your attitude (I totally understand they are humans too, but if the other party did not do anything to you, don’t show your attitude to them vice versa)… then sorry, you can leave. I treat my helper like my family (you won’t harm your family right?) and I hope she can do the same at least during her working years. It’s mentally draining if you have to keep being cautious over someone or wonder if they are gonna harm you any day. If so, what’s the point of having her? She’s here to help you offload, not to add on. But of course, this is my own household and POV. I’ve had helper from hell before too, she basically tells us to do EVERYTHING ourselves and you CANNOT instruct her to chores. She goes on her own schedule daily. Raises her voice at employers, scolds and light hits on children. When my 3yo ask her to help get him water, she replies “can’t you take it yourself? You have legs right? Cannot see I’m sweeping the floor is it?” I’m like 👀.