Is it stupid to divorce your husband because of your mil

I have been having issues with mil ever since I gave birth. The situation has not changed and my baby is 15 months. I just don’t feel my husband is supportive. My mil keeps telling everyone that she cares about me and wants to help. But if she wants to help, why would she say things like I walk away, baby smiles… then complain my maternity is 6 months so baby sticks to me. Also, once she has hold of baby, if baby finds me she will not pass him back. She acts victim and cries in front of the family saying don’t know why I don’t like her… I am so stressed by the whole situation. And anything to do with baby, she will say me. If baby has tummy pain, she will ask me what I eat cause I am breastfeeding. Baby don’t want to eat she will ask me what I cook… I feel like she is blaming me for everything. Baby makes a bit of noise she will ask me to pass to her.., I feel like I am such a lousy mum or what..: I am literally having depression.#advicepls #firsttimemom #firstbaby #helps

Anonymous

19 Replies

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The issue, as you mentioned yourself, is that your husband is not supportive. He needs to step up and be a good husband and father to you as you will be living with him for the rest of your life. If he’s really incompetent at taking care of the baby and protecting you, his wife, then perhaps you’ve got to reconsider if you can live with this for the rest of your life. Your MIL is a separate issue. Are you living with her right now? Try to get out of your current living situation as soon as you can.

Anonymous

1y ago

Many SG man is such a mummy boy. They are not protecting their wife but everything listen to their MOMS. Very useless man. And MOMS always like to control the son, and accuse wife wrong. The mummy boys have no own opinion or own thinking. What mummy says is correct.. i have a friend's husband also same kind. And i would suggest just divorce for god sake. You dont stand up and make a step forward, they will continue pressing you down, and more n more u keep quiet, u have no way to stand in the family. I bliv u will feel like u r an outsider. If can, stay w your own mom. Even u do not want to divoce, say it out is better than thinking. You guys emotion are also affecting the baby, baby is so sensitive now. Stand up lady! Dont let them keep pressing u, u still have long way to go, this will last for many years. If talk to ur husband is not working, then shout, if not, divorce. Why make yourself so suffer? Tell straight to ur MIL face, if she still acting like this, u will divorce, and the

U must talk to your husband how you are feeling. Let him know the situation. Also, if best if u could stay away from her, perhaps by staying at yr parents place instead. Just a short period, a breather I must say. Don’t get too affected with your MIL cos this will affect your mental too :) we can stay in touch thru Instagram, mine is lzawang.. if u need someone to talk to! sahm here 😊

Distance makes the beauty. She needs to understand that three of you are a family now and she is out of it. Even said so, I’m having the same issue, not with mil, but with my own mother, she blames me the same way. I think only living separately could help, and find your mil something more meaningful to do than eyeing on you and the baby.

oh dear that's major. it's easier for me because I can just shut people out as in, don't let them come over to my place to help, I relie more onto my mother, even tho she can be pushy but there's the comfort of familiarity..

Mum To Be

Got a bun in the oven

1y ago

Because of my mil, I can’t even ask my mum to help cause she will complain unfair etc…

u r not the worse situation that I seen. maybe u just live separately, seldom visit them lozz.. I also do so .. the most important is talk to Ur husband n discuss a solution together.. get support from him.

Sounds like someone you need to stay away from. If that is not possible and your husband will not support you, then other solutions certainly come into consideration. I hope it works out for you.

VIP Member

The best thing to do would be to have a very open conversation with your husband about it. You can even consider involving a couple’s councilor to work it out.

VIP Member

same feeling i had currently ...i feel you

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