My baby won’t go to sleep

My 3 weeks old daughter is suddenly very awake and doesn’t want to go to sleep. Used to be easy, feed and she’ll be sleepy and just put her back in cot. Only fusses when diaper is soiled, and when she’s hungry again. Now she’s not having it. She’ll go quiet during feeding and unlatches from the mother after she falls asleep, put her in the cot and she immediately stirs up and cries. Carry her and cradle her and sing to her and she doze off, put her back in and cry again. Checks her diapers and change, feed again in case for comfort feeding. She falls asleep and put her back in cot and immediately same thing happens again. This can go on for hours! Instead of 2-3 hours feeding interval it’s become 6-7 hours of just cradling and re-latching just to keep her at that “sleep mode”. We are at our wits end. Don’t know what to do! #pleasehelp #advicepls

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Your baby might be having her first growth spurt! The first one happens anytime aroung 1-3 weeks and they start to do this thing called cluster feeding, you can go read it up. During that time they get so hungry and uneasy they literally want to be glued to you. Is your baby really hungry when she wakes and cry? When my boy was around 3 weeks it was when he started getting more "awake" and started noticing more what's going on around him and would start to notice him being left alone in his cot which makes him have a bit of separation anxiety. He also started refusing his cot around then, but he wasn't hungry (I have a bit of an oversupply) just wanted to be carried, when we let him lie on our chests to sleep he can sleep for hours without stirring. It's tiring as hell because you can't sleep like that, but for me that was the only way my boy would stay asleep. He's now 2 months and from around 1 month he started accepting his cot a bit at night when he's really sleepy, but it's getting a bit better with time. It's still too early to sleep train him in the cot so we're holding that back to around 3-4 months, for now just setting up a good routine for him which makes him sleep better at night (and more likely to sleep in his cot). When he refuses my hubby and I just takes turn cuddling him. Find a nice recliner or sofa, make yourself comfortable and get ready to book or your phone to pass time while baby sleeps. In the day if you need to be up and moving try using a sling or carrier, although mine doesn't like that, a lot of babies would happily sleep in one while you're up and doing your stuff. If it's really a growth spurt it might really just pass in a few days. All the best and hope things improves for you!

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1y ago

Yeah. After some reading, that seems to be it. And nope, she’s not very hungry that’s just it. After having a heavy feed of about an hour or so she falls aslp and unlatches. It’s only after swaddling and leaving her in the cot she starts her crying streaks. Which goes on every time we put her down after that, of which the feed only lasted like 5mins, more like comfort feeding to stop her crying but it doesn’t last as she falls aslp. Only to happen again once she’s put down. So yeah, we went on to just having to settle for keeping her cuddled. I do most of it so my wife can rest as otherwise it’s literally breast feeding, + cuddling, then zero rest. Seems to work for now. Hopefully it’s really the growth spurt phase. 🙏🏽

It's totally normal. I had similar experience with my newborn. He kept wanting to latch and cried when put down. I went several days without sleep, there were days I was literally glued to the bed as he didn't want to unlatch. I had postnatal blues, broke down several times. I didn't have enough supply but my husband and mom are supportive. I eventually gave in to supplementing with formula as my milk supply didn't seem to be able to keep up with baby's need (baby boys are known to be big eaters). My baby alr had a taste of formula when he was in NICU for phototherapy in his first wk so we followed through and gave him formula twice a day (bm for the rest). He seemed more contented and cld sleep longer. It gets better aft a month and at 2 months he's now able to slp longer stretches frm ard 11pm to 5am. That first month is always incredibly hard but give as much support as u can to ur wife, physically and emotionally. My husband and mom kept assuring me tt I'm doing a gd job. Hug ur wife and on the days u're not working, try to stay up with her while she's breastfeeding.

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Not sure if it’s the same issue as mine. My baby refuses to sleep in his cot. It’s not really a hungry/diaper issue. At this age, he could be seeking comfort. Mine was the same. He will wake up and cry after 15-20min in the cot. I end up putting him on my chest. He sleeps well there. Could go for 2-3 hours before waking up for milk again. Slept on my chest till he’s about 3-4 months. Then we co-sleep. It’s not the best advice cause it’s quite dangerous to put baby on chest unless ure awake. But I was quite a light sleeper and I will wake up if he moves, and we didn’t have any issues. Just be careful if u wanna to try this. Or maybe one of u could be awake to keep watch? Or sleep on a padded mattress on the floor? Sometimes they just want to feel safe. At this stage, they like our presence and feel safe when listen to our heartbeat.

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I'm going through the same with my 7 day old preemie nb. What I know is that sometimes they seek comfort through latching. I only brought home my nb 2 days ago and honestly it drives me crazy on the 1st night cos we did not buy any fm and I had to wake my husband up @ 1am and tell him to go out and buy a tin. So now I bf & also fm my baby since my milk is not much yet but I do express and store my milk. When my nb fusses and refuses to sleep, I will feed him with fm and he will go to sleep and wake up 3-4 hrs later. Most of the times I latch him. Only when he fusses and refuses to sleep then I give him fm.

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Try swaddle her before you pat her to sleep, it will make her feel comfy and after she fall asleep you can put her in her crib gently with butt down. Do make sure to burp her after feed and let her rest awhile in your arm (45deg angle) in case colic although won't be so early. Maybe you can swaddle before feeding her.

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Mine happened when my girl at her 4weeks old, and i gave her pacifier and solved everything. U may try it.

1y ago

Btw not every baby can accept pacifier too, i am lucky enough that my baby ok with Avent brand (despite i bought so many higher end brand, but she rejected them). My friend’s baby rejected all the pacifiers and she is struggling to make the baby sleep everynight for 4mths.