Relationship with Parents-in-law

Question

Hi, any mommies here have issues with your parents in law being too close to your baby? my baby is the first grandkid in the family and my parents in law dote on her a lot, esp my mil since she always wanted a daughter. However for me, not sure if it is post partum depression, i fear seeing my child being close to them esp my mil, every time she takes care of her i feel frustrated and uneasy, as if she is taking her away from me and treating her like her own daughter. it even makes me hate my mil. and i fear that one day she will prefer my mil over me… which happened a few times recently.how do you all handle such situations? am i over sensitive? #Needadvice

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Don’t worry! Your baby will know who is her mother and prefer you as she grows up. It’s a special mother and child bond built when she was inside your womb. Nobody can break this! 💪🏻💪🏻 I usually try to think more positively - it’s always better to have family members who love my child. I have seen other mommies sharing that their in law shows no concern for their grandkid, which is quite disappointing. Otherwise, you can try asking your husband to talk to his parents to tone down on their behaviour. Talk in a neutral way - so that your in law won’t misunderstand you too.

LB · Answer

Hm..I would think that its instinctive that we as mothers want to keep our babies close to us, coz we naturally feel that being with us is the safest place for them. But as another mummy pointed out, the kid will grow up, and as you spend more time with her, she will naturally come to bond more closely with you. That aside, it's a good thing for the grandparents to be involved coz you do need a village to help with the kid once she starts school, what with all the falling sick etc. As long as they keep to their boundaries ie dont override or intentionally do things tt the parents had expressedly said no to, IMO, it's fine.