Mil shows favoritism towards her daughter's child

My mil is really a piece of shit. She shows favoritism twards her daughter's children over mine. But my baby boy is basically being treated like a part time grandson. Me and husb staying with her temporarily, so cant avoid her at all. She will do anything, and i mean ANYTHING for my sil's kids. Even when she is unwell or having knee pain, she can rush to meet them at their school to send them home (they are staying at another place). She take bus with them and send them home and comes home afterwards. But when i pangsai or doing my chores and my baby crying uncontrollably, she will most of the time, ignore and stay in her room. She will only come and help soothe my baby when she feels like it. There is no sense of urgency to check on baby at all. If she happens to be there when baby is crying then she will attend to him. Otherwise she will just ignore. And just now i had an outburst. As my baby was crying to the extent of shouting crying kind of cry. HE WAS SITTING IN HIS HIGH CHAIR INFRONT OF HER ROOM (she close her door by the way & our rooms are opposite of each other) meanwhile i was at the kitchen preparing his bath, i was rushing as fuck. When i came back to him, i saw he was trying to stand in his high chair. AND STILL SHE DIDNT EVEN BOTHER TO OPEN THE DOOR TO CHECK ON HIM.. what kind of grandmother is this? But when it comes to her favorite grandkids, wahhhhh, she will ask me to look after them for awhile (age 10 & 12 btw) when she was having urgent zoom call. But MY BABY?? SHE JUST IGNORE AND ACT LIKE AS IF SHE WAS DEAF. Idk what she was doing in her room when my baby was crying just now, but even if you wear earpiece while watching videos, you CERTAINLY would have heard him. Because i do. This attitude is unjustified. This is too much. So obviously, i was so upset that i said loudly NOBODY IS RELIABLE IN THIS HOUSE, MY BABY CRYING OUTSIDE YOUR ROOM ALSO YOU CAN IGNORE, USELESS.. Then just now i was sharing with my mother about this, talking otp with her. Then suddenly i heard her door slammed shut. Could it be she was eavesdropping to my convo? Because what i rant to my mother was really raw. If she heard it, she will obviously feel mad about it, i think? Ughh... it's not that i care about her feelings.. but i dont want her to play the victim and complain to my husband and paint the picture like i am the bad guy that said hurtful things about her... Sorry for the long post. Just needed place to rant and vent.

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Hey mama, I truly empathise with you and I am sorry you are experiencing what you described above. That must be so fustrating and hurtful to feel that your MIL isn’t helping and seems to play favourites. It could be that MIL is just not fond of babies? I even know of fathers who don’t enjoy the baby stage and switch off completely, but when the kids are older (6 above), they seem to be the most attentive and doting dad! Was your mother in law as involved with her other grand kids when they were babies? If I ever you, I would have hubby speak to his mum and ask her how come she seems to not want to be so involved in her grandsons life, and to really find out what the root cause is.

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1y ago

yes she took care of them all since babies..