Rant on Husband do not want to help out in raising kids , advice pls .
Hi , my child is 20 months now . Husband pays for bills. And is less than $150 total every month . As we're staying in a hdb rental . He helps to pay for groceries on some item that he allows to buy . So for child diaper, school fee and all that is related to childI have to fork out my own . He does not give me any allowance. He does not seem to be interested in taking care of child . Only play with her for awhile when he is back . And when the child cry , he'll pretend not to hear and expect me to come out of the shower asap or stop doing my things . Be it both of us are eating , he finishes first , child crying and want my attention , he can wash his hand first and comfort till I take over but he just glued to the TV . When I tell him to do something to help , he will say baby doesn't want me la / what u want me to do in a frustrated manner . Ask for some allowance back then , since he don't want to take care physically , he will keep giving excuses that he need to pay this and that . End up I know he can take grab thru and fro to work everyday , borrow his friend money , set aside money to have outing with his friend , buy what he wants, buy his ciggs . During weekend , sometimes he do pay for our meals. But it's like that kind of feeling where I've to ask to help to help then he will . And tht kind of helping take care of baby is usually 5 min or so , and will pester me to faster carry her over. Or whenever I ask for help , he purposely light up cigg saying he smoking must wait . All the way taking care of my child myself sending her from school and back even tho I'm working is super tiring . I just feel like giving up . During sat , when he wakes up first with her , he will just play with her instead of providing her with breakfast and changing her fully soaked diaper . Doesnt mean u don't eat breakfast , my child too does not need breakfast . All he does is have fun . And when outside or in front of people , he will show that he take care of the child and all. All for show. And when people not around he totally dun care . Like he no different from other people only play with her, just that she sees her everyday .. and the saddest part is that , after all , the child does not listen s to me , but is afraid of the dad and will listen to whatever the dad ask to do .. Many feelings about this I have said to him but nvr really change. We are still on good terms tho , as I do not want to make things worse for the kid and this family . Social worker told me I can go to court to get some mantaince monetory . But I think it will ruin our relationship . Why is he like this...I have been thinking of divorce many times but do not want to make a wrong step ..wht should I do to make him take some responsibility of his own child. #advicepls