High ego Husband

Any one of you have a husband that has high ego? How do you all deal with. We are not able to communicate all the time, because he is always concerning about money and keep asking me to earn more money and keep upgrading myself. EVERY SINGLE DAY he will say this. I feel like our relationship is all about money etc. More over he does not fork up a single cents to pay for our Son groceries, each time I have asked him to give me money To pay for son’s diaper he will find excuses saying he is paying for some other stuffs. I couldn’t stand the way he always says that I am not able to educate our child, not able to communicate well and mixing with Low standard people that lead me no where. I feel like I don’t have any freedom to do my own things (Eg: I wanted to have some me time to watch show etc, he will said things like “ does this help you to improve your self, by watching this show do you think it can make you a better person”)... I couldn’t hold any Long in such relationship, and I cannot even communicate with him. ... I feel so pressured by him all the time...

Anonymous

7 Replies

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I don’t know about others, but this relationship is not healthy. My friend’s husband is exactly the same and she became in control of his crazy mental, which drives my friend crazy that we can no longer communicate with her. Don’t allow yourself to give in to him just to avoid quarrels. If you tried all ways to talk things out (of course you yourself need to have healthy mindset about what a relationship is all about first), but doesn’t work, I don’t think this relationship is worth carry on. Because he thinks that you will never leave or disobey him, so he will only carry on to talk with ego. This won’t change unless something big happen that can affect him enough.

Anonymous

4y ago

Can sense how helpless you may feel. Agree its unhealthy as It has to do with power dynamics and he gets the upper hand by forcing you to think/act in certain manner. But your actions may perpetrate his behaviours too. Great that you are taking the first step to reach out. Perhaps can try to gain back control by asking him more questions to und what he really means n make him reflect as he shares, n u strive to get back more control. Many basic agreements need to be in place too. For eg; what does he mean by low level friends? What is high level? How much is he spending on family, can he list out? What is the proportion vs pay that you agree to spend on family. The first response you give him is to ask more. In this way it creates space for you to not feel offended/defensive and to gain back some control by making him respond to you further.

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