Just wanted to gain some perspective... I live with my parents in law and have a 5mo baby~
She is an easy baby and doesn't really cry much, very easy to take care. Sleeps through the night also, so we don't really need to adjust our own schedule to baby for anything. I have a pretty good relationship with in laws, but some things they do very irritating... like I know it is out of good will, but like I just can't wrap my head around it and can't feel better no matter how I think about it
Like for example baby sometimes will cling onto me and lie on my chest, then when I bring her out to living room, in laws will literally pry her fingers open from my clothes and carry her over, just because they want to hold her
Or like when I bring her out to living room so she can play with rest of family, they always like insist "I take care you go rest". But like (1) I don't need the rest? And (2) I don't really want to leave my baby alone with them.. but cannot really say anything because I don't want my husband to be in difficult position.
My husband not at home one time and in law before going out to buy dinner tell me don't shower baby until she come back in case i cannot handle.. (????? Then forever we need more than 2 people to take care of the kid at home meh). These things don't usually happen when my husband is home because he is fierce and they don't do it to him... because I keep trying to protect my husband's feelings also, I feel like they think I am a pushover (which in all other parts of my life I don't have any issue establishing boundaries assertively one)
I feel angry sometimes because I don't like these things happening, but afterwards also feel guilty and wonder if I am being petty or over protective because I still want my baby to have a community...
Has anyone had the same experience?
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edit: thank you everyone for sharing your experience, perspectives and advice 🙏 I feel a lot more relieved as I am reminded that my feelings are valid, and that I can still establish my boundaries - especially in a polite way! Have also taken steps to share w HB and he has spoken up to family when necessary.