Roarrr!!! LO is 16mo. This morning, LO was whining for this and that and mum sternly said no to him. LO kept quiet seeking for help from grandpa, however grandpa feign ignorance. Mum, Dad and I agreed that we shouldnt give in to LO. Then LO turned to me to whine for things again, i said no firmly and he cried. Yet my mum went over to pass LO the things and sayang him. "Aiyo mummy scold u ar, kk grandma sayang, don cry" Wtf leh! So angry with mum's double standards!!!

You are definitely not alone. Elders are also soft and give in easily and they dont take instructions seriously also. Like my FIL, he simply just spoils my son without any reason. Like literally the moment he step into their house he give him toys, toys and toys... Rarely discipline him since he over indulge him as he was the first grandchild. Son was under my MIL care when I was FTWM for the first few years, so imagine during that few years of indulgence in toys? Then CNY more double standard, my son refused to greet grandma in law (FIL's MIL), he even fiercely scold my son why so rude never greet her. My mind was thinking "Sibeh wayang. Act like he always discipline him"

Sad to say, this is very common among grandparents - but the bright side is, their starting point is good because they care about LO! You'd face a lot more of such situations in future. Sometimes it's like a power struggle, others it's like they just want to raise them as their own - quarrels and arguments will happen, but always remember that they care about your LO that's why they are there :) When the need arises, set your foot down and lay ground rules - but otherwise, just let things be!

I won't say double standard. After all, in a household, there is bound to be an 'angel' and 'devil' My mil is one example. (i saw this thru cctv myself till now she thinks that i dont know) In front of me, she become the ultimate angel to the grandkids. But when im not around, she beats them with cane. So whenever im around, and my kids are behaving like monkeys, they would usually go to grandma there and hide.

My mom will be like that too. But I will ask my mommy to take away and leave the room. So tat it’s only me and my baby. And I will start to “lecture” my baby. I don’t care if he understand or not, but have to let him know.

Hi, It is completely normal with grandparents affection haha. I would suggest speak to them politely that how this behaviour might affect the way you are trying to discipline your child

It’s normal as that’s how grandparents show their affection to LO. Just need to emphasise to your parents not to go against you, when your disciplining your LO

Grandparents tend to spoil grandchildren. Thats just the way it is. Need to continually emphasize to your mum not to override your authority over your kid.

Oh my... is this your mum or in law ? If is in law get your hub speak to her. If its your mum, speak to her on how u feel should work together

I also don’t understand the don’t cry don’t cry they have feelings leh need to let it out, our generation not theirs

Grandparents are generally like that(: You can try talking to your mom about it and remind her gently about the rules etc