Ask the Expert: Nurturing Emotional Intelligence From Early Childhood

Dear Felicia, Thank you for writing in. At 2 years old, children are in an exploratory phase of development, trying to make sense of the world around them. While they experience the same emotions as older children and adults, they don’t yet have the language skills to express them. Instead of saying, "I feel upset that my toy broke," a toddler might show their frustration through behaviors like throwing things, pushing, or even trying to bite. These are all normal and typical behaviors for a toddler. I encourage you to acknowledge your own frustration—parenting can be exhausting and challenging at times. Often, our children’s behaviors can trigger old wounds from our own childhoods, such as feelings of helplessness, lack of control, or insecurity when they act out. When our survival mode kicks in, we may react in ways we don’t intend. It’s important to remain calm when he’s having a meltdown. You can set boundaries by holding his hands gently and saying something like, "I’m here with